prayingforabbygrace

Blog Home Has Moved

2011-09-15T19:25:00.000-05:00

I am in the process of moving my blog over to another location. Please head over to my new blog @ www.amomofmany.blogspot.com and "follow" there so we can stay in touch. Thank you!!!

it is is the process of getting a make over so be patient while I work on the cuteness!! :)

Blog Home Has Moved

2011-09-15T13:44:00.001-05:00

I am in the process of moving my blog over to another location. Please head over to my new blog and "follow" there so we can stay in touch. Thank you!!!

it is is the process of getting a make over so be patient while I work on the cuteness!! :)

Five Question Friday

2011-02-24T21:23:00.006-06:00

This week I am participating in Five Question Friday with Mama M. Won't you join in on the fun???

1. Can you drive a stick shift?
Absolutely not!! If I had to commit to changing gears, that would leave no time for applying make-up or changing the radio station!! HA

2. What are two foods you just can't eat?
I am SERIOUSLY far from picky, and likely will eat most things that don't eat me first, HOWEVER the one thing I can think that I will not eat is raw oysters. Not going to do it.....EVER. I did once, and won't give you the gross details of what happened. Your welcome.

3. Do you buy Girl Scout Cookies? What is your favorite kind?
We didn't buy any this year, but yes I do love them. The mint chocolate ones are my fave and I like to eat them after they have been in the freezer for a while. Weird I know.

4. How do you pamper yourself?
I get my nails and toes done abotu once a month. Makes me feel good about myself and I am generally a happier person after they are all done.

5. What is your nickname and how did you get it?
Since I was a little bitty girl I have been called A.B. My name is Amanda Beth, so my family has been calling me that forever. My daddy started it, and the Hubs has picked it up over the years.

Love that this blog post requires no emotional energy or real brain power. So refreshing to post about things other than hospital trips and medical updates for the babies!! Hope that everyone has a great weekend!!!

Be blessed,
Amanda

Five Question Friday

2011-02-18T09:11:00.004-06:00

Yes, I am still alive!! Today at am doing 5 Question Friday with Mama M. Such a fun blog hop, you should join in on the fun!!!!!! Head over to her blog to check it out.....

1. Have you worn the same outfit more than one day in a row?
Yes I have. In my defense, I stay in my PJ's for the majority of the day being home with the little ones. If we are going out somewhere and I get dressed, I have no shame in hanging it back in the closet to wear again. Don't judge......

2. If you had to choose any LARGE city to live in, which would it be?
Honestly I don't think I would want to live in any bigger of a city than we do now. We are right outside of Houston, so we can go to any "major" event without too much of a drive. Plus, we would have to move our entire families with us to make it worth it. I am so thankful that everyone lives so close and I wouldn't want to change that. However if we had to move, I would want to move farther OUT of the city than closer in.................

3. Fly or drive with the kids on vacation?
If cost didn't matter then I would choose to fly for sure. However since my husband is totally NOT in to flying, it would take entirely too many drugs to actually get him on the plane and then I would just have one more child on my hands......who wants that? So no matter what I want, driving is the best thing for my family and I can live with that.

4. What is your idea of "spring cleaning"?
Cleaning out and getting rid of things we don't need. I have done TONS of that in the last couple of weeks. PURGE PURGE PURGE!!!!

5. What is the best book you have ever read?
I Will Carry You by Angie Smith is at the top of my list. She is an amazing writer and her book holds a special place in my heart.

And the sickness continues.....

2011-01-20T11:06:00.003-06:00

Oh my goodness, I am SO READY to blog about fun things like new projects I am working on right now, great handbags and shoes I saw online, or some celebrity gossip I read...................

BUT

that is the farthest thing from my life right now. So here I am blogging about the sickness that is in my house and just refuses to leave!! So, if you are beyond tired of reading about snotty noses and coughs I totally understand.

Last Tuesday evening Tyler all the sudden started coughing and I knew immediately he had croup again. And when I say "all the sudden" I am not joking; it literally came on in a matter of minutes. I immediately closed him in his bedroom and busted out the bleach wipes. Wednesday we headed straight for the doctor as his nastly little cough had turned into something monstrous!!

Anyhow, he indeed had croup and so they gave him a steroid shot to try and keep his airway open. Because he has asthma as well his croup can get pretty bad....PERFECT! And don't you just love taking your kiddo to the doctor to hear the INFAMOUS, "it's viral, it will just have to run its course!" I HATE THAT!!! Poor baby has just been miserable.

The story gets better...........about 2 hours after we left the pediatricia's office she calls me back. She says that she spoke with Owen's pulmonary doctor and they both felt it would be good for Owen to NOT be in the same house with Tyler. Owen's immune system is still compromised from having RSV (the latest hospital adventure that I didn't blog about) and that if he did get croup, it would be very serious. So, I threw a mini-tantrum and called my mom. She offered to keep the babies until Ty gets well. Today, they have been there for 6 days. I am about to go crazy even though I have been going over every afternoon and staying until they are both asleep each night.

My mom emailed me a simple prayer that I am going to start praying over each room in the house EVERY DAY. Here it is:

ASAP- Always Say A Prayer

"God, our Father, walk through my house and take away all my worries and illnesses and please watch over and heal my family in Jesus name, Amen"

Tyler is still not better and I am going to call the doctor again today. I know it has to run it's course, but goodess I am ready for him to feel better. Poor baby.

Amanda

Another Angel in Heaven

2011-01-18T09:29:00.002-06:00

I have gone back on forth on whether or not to blog about this, but it is a REAL struggle I am going through and I try to be honest on this blog so I feel I should share.

MUCH to our surprise, David and I learned we were expecting our 5th child about 10 weeks ago. Many many thoughts raced through our mind like, "where will we put another child; how will we afford said child; what are our parent's going to say (as if we are reckless teenagers or something HA!!); wow I guess you really can get pregnant while nursing LOL; and many other panicked thoughts.

BUT, after the panic wears off then love and excitement starts to grow and settle in. I was thrilled with the idea of Owen having a playmate so close in age like Kayli and Tyler are. They would have been 14 months apart, just like Kayli and Ty. We did not share the news with our families or the older kids, because we wanted time to pray and really know that things were okay before letting everyone in on the secret.

Christmas Day I started having a little cramping but nothing to severe. I feared the worst and tried to push away the negative thoughts. That night Kayli and Tyler left for Disney World for 10 days so I wanted to enjoy our day together.

Then on the 26th things got much worse and I started to bleed and I knew exactly what was happening. I have been through a miscarriage before and also knew I needed to get to the doctor. That night we ended up in the Emergency room because the pain was so severe I couldn't stop throwing up and couldn't walk. My worst fears were confirmed that we indeed had lost the baby. I was very much devastated and reeling from the news and could not believe we were going through such loss AGAIN.

The next day, which happened to be Monday, I got in to see my OB and I knew exactly what was coming. I was going to need a D & C and the DR sent us straight to the hospital. Mind you, a lot of our family didn't even know we were pregnant!! Phone calls were made and I went into surgery within the hour.

It was a very quick, but NOT painless, procedure. I was out of commission for the rest of the week. Thank goodness my sweet husband had already scheduled vacation for the week because I NEEDED him and he was able to be there. He was so gentle and compassionate to my heartache and also took care of my physical needs. I am so thankful for him and the way he loves me. Never will I take that for granted again.

So the physical pain has gone (thank goodness), but I still bear the emotional wounds and they will take a LONG time to heal. Right now I am trying to surround myself around family and good friends who can love on me and offer some support. I have made a vow not to get into the pit I did when we went through the first loss. I did not handle it well at all but this time my marriage is so much stronger, and it has made all the difference in the world.

Now we have 2 babies in Heaven and it just makes me long to be there even more. I just know my Mammaw and my Grammie will have rocked them like crazy by the time I get there. :)

Thank you for lifting me up and prayer like you all are always so faithful to do. And thanks so much to my sweet friends who have called or sent texts sending their love.

Amanda

My Mammaw's Memorial Service

2011-01-18T08:52:00.005-06:00

A few weeks ago I blogged about my Mammaw possibly spending her first Christmas in Heaven. The Lord heard our prayers and called her home on Christmas Eve about 9:30pm. She made it just in time for the celebration to begin!! That blesses my heart more than I can say.

My Mammaw lived here with my parents for the last 3 and 1/2 years, but prior to that she lived in Decatur Texas for over 30 years. Because of that, we had 2 memorial services, one here and one there. She had 3 children, 13 grandchildren, and 29 great-grandchildren (almost 30). Isn't that amazing? I pray that I will leave the same legacy behind that she did. She had such a servant's heart and definately brought life to the scripture "thy good and faithful servant". Here on earth, we will never be the same, but oh how I long for the day we will all be together again.

Here are some pictures from the memorial services. It was so nice to see family that we haven't seen in such a long time.

It was such a sweet time of fellowship and many great memories were made. We EVEN got SNOWED IN!!! I will blog about that in just a bit.

A Slower Pace

2011-01-17T00:03:00.000-06:00

Before I get to the post I thought I would show you all a cute picture of Owen just for fun!! LOVE this sweet boy to pieces......

Anyway......moving on to the point of this post.

I did not make a resolution at the new year, but now that it is mid-January (or end January, whatever), I am really wanting to change some things.

Right now, my family needs some routine, some order, and some peace. Our life as a whole has been one crisis after another for such a long time that I think it is beyond past time to slow down!!! Don't get me wrong, things have all worked out for good and I know every situation could have ended MUCH differently than they they did, but I am longing for a little normalcy. I feel like my house is a cluttered, upside down wreck and when you already have lots of people in a small space; organization is key............or so I am thinking, because UNorganization clearly is not working!! Anyhow, I feel like the kids and my marriage need to just SLOW DOWN a bit.

Can anyone relate to that?

So, this month I am really trying to keep the kids on a schedule, cook dinner as much as possible, organize and PURGE things in my house, and generally just slow down..... Is that possible when you have 4 kids? I am certainly going to attempt it.

I started today by taking down the Christmas decorations (we got an extension since they were VERY late going up) and putting my living room back the way it belongs. Also, I got a VERY large plastic tote so that I can put all my donate items in one central area. Tomorrow I hope to get all up the laundry clean and put away, so I can go through all the kids clothes and pull out everything that is too small. I just feel like we have WAY too much stuff and it is stressing me out big time. I want our happiness and contentment to come from each other and not all our stuff. Make sense?

Anyhow I better keep going while I still have the urge. My poor husband is going to get tired of this, quick. I'm afraid his honey do list is going to grow. Right now I am praying for a linen closet before the end of the week!! :)

Hope everyone is doing well. Stay tuned, I want to show before and after pictures of the organization, if I am brave enough to post the before!! HA!!

Amanda

PS-Feel free to comment with your tips on how you stay organized and sane through the chaos, I would LOVE to hear from you!!

MY FIRST Five Question Friday!!

2011-01-13T20:03:00.005-06:00

Today I am participating in Five Question Friday with Mama M. over at

So here we go!!!

1. What movie could you watch over and over again and not get tired of?
Sweet Home Alabama and Devil Wears Prada-never can get tired of those 2!!!

2. What's your biggest pet peeve right now?
Absolutely cannot tolerate smacking from the kids. Makes my skin crawl no lie!!

3. If you had to describe your best friend in five words or less, what would you say?
faithful, loving, handsome, charming.........there that was only 4 words

4. If you did not have to worry about money or go to school what would you do for a living?
A NICU nurse or PCA

5. What is your one "splurge" item, that you will always buy, no matter the cost?
Cannot go without getting my nails done.

Oh there, that was much fun!! Cannot wait to keep doing these fun little blog hops!

Windows Live Writer

2010-12-30T21:42:00.001-06:00

I have been getting more than fed up with blogger and the amount of time it takes to put a post together with pictures so I am going to try Windows Live Writer. Hopefully this will help to use my time more efficiently and thus more posts coming your way!!

Honestly I didn’t really have a purpose to blog tonight, other than trying out the new system and trying to add in pictures so here goes nothing. Hope you all enjoy this family picture. I LOVE it!!!

Wow, that was SOOOO easy!! I might just blog again today. Hope you guys had an awesome Christmas.

Amanda

First Christmas in Heaven

2010-12-22T14:10:00.005-06:00

My beloved Mammaw, (my mom's mom) whom I have blogged about on multiple occasions is in the hospital extremely ill right now. It is so crazy to think about, because she has always been SO active and been so involved with my kids that I cannot imagine her not being here.

Currently, her poor body is ridden with infection and honestly she is not going to come out of this. She has streptoccocol pneumonia, bacterial meningitis, sepsis from an infection in her blood, and has a UTI. My sweet mom, has been by her side for almost a week now and right now we are just praying the Lord will take her sooner rather than later. They are giving her medication to keep her comfortable and out of pain, but we are not allowed to go back to the hospital at the risk of spreading the infection to our babies.

It has been very difficult, as close as we all are to not be by her side during the last few days. It is honestly killing me to not be there with her, although she wouldn't know if I was in the room or not. My sister in law is 8 months pregnant and obviously cannot be exposed either.

Would you just pray for peace over our family right now? Help me to explain to Abby Grace in a way that she can understand, because she is VERY close to my Mammaw, and her little heart is hurting right now.

As sad as I am about her being so ill, I am beyond excited for her to be spending her first Christmas in Heaven if that is the Lord's plan. But I have to admit, the thought of her not being here to watch my babies grow absolutely breaks my heart. She has always been their biggest cheerleader.

Abby Grace Christmas Program

2010-12-22T13:30:00.008-06:00

Here I am trying to "catch up" this blog, AGAIN. Sometimes I wonder why I even keep it up, I am so bad at it, but then I feel guilty when I don't blog and here I am in this cycle ALL.THE.TIME......

Anyhow, Abby Grace was in her first ever Christmas Program at church and it was the cutest.thing.EVER. They sang 3 songs, Jingle Bell Rock, Away in a Manger, and I want a Hippoptomus for Christmas. My video is terrible because I couldn't stop laughing through the whole thing. It was wonderful to see all the little kids up there so proud to be singing for Jesus.

Abby Grace was SOO proud because she had an entire entourage there just for her. Momma, Daddy, Kayli, Tyler, Owen, Nana, G-Pa, Grandma and Grandpa were all there to cheer her on. She had been SO excited all day long, and then right before it was time to go on stage, she changed her mind. I mean, crying, freaking out, and was not going to do it. Needless to say, she changed her mind and the show was unforgettable.

Here are some pictures from the night and even video if you can stand the shaking!!

Scrooge Play

2010-12-13T10:46:00.007-06:00

A few weeks ago, my mom got tickets for all of us to go and see Scrooge at the theatre here in town. The kids were SO excited and would not stop harassing me about "When is it time"!! Some good friends went with us and I think a good time was had by all..........

Until the ghosts of Christmas past came on and scared all the little ones half to death!! LOL, some of the play wasn't exactly pre-school age friendly, if you will. That NEVER even crossed my mind, honestly. I did not prepare them whatsoever. So now, the big joke is that Grannie isn't allowed to pick the play unless someone else makes sure it's appropriate for the kids, HA!!!

Anyhow, here are pictures from our night. All in all, we really had a great time. Thanks for the tickets Mom!!!

Love this picture!! Wish Owen was in in, and I might have a Christmas Card!!

Love this one with my niece and nephew too!

Madelyne and Trevon

Chelsea and Mili

Chelsea, Debbie, and Mili

Grannie with her grand kids, some of them anyway

KiKi (my sister, Kim) and Abby Grace and Kayli

This one is good too. And I didn't even have to threaten them to smile.

Beautiful!

Grannie and the girls

My handsome man, Ty

the boys

Abby Grace and Mili, sharing a chair waiting so patiently for the play to start.

We had an awesome time, thanks mom!!
Amanda

Our Soldier is HOME!!!

2010-12-13T10:16:00.005-06:00

On December 4, our soldier came home safely!!! I'm sure you all remember me posting about David's brother, Brian being deployed for a second time. It was a very difficult deployment for everyone but we are so thankful it is over!!! We went to the airport as a family to welcome him home and it is something I will never forget. Abby Grace loves her Uncle Brian with something fierce, and she absolutely could not wait to be in his arms!! I'm not sure who was more excited Abby Grace or Ally Rae!! Every night before bed, Abby Grace would pray for Jesus to protect him and bring him home soon. When we were waiting for him to come off the plane, she said "Momma Jesus heard my prayers, He heard my prayers!!. Uncle Brian is coming home" I cried at the innocence of her sweet voice. She knew Brian would be home because she had prayed for it, and believed in her little heart that God would honor that prayer. A lot I could learn from a 4 year old!

Now his Momma can rest easy knowing he is safe, and Ally Rae has her other half at her side once again!! Praise the Lord!!!! It will be the best Christmas ever, everyone together safe and sound. We are so thankful.

What is a homecoming without a giant sign?

Together again, at last!

So excited to see Uncle Brian

She had been coloring him pictures and cards while he was away and keeping them all together in a special envelope. When I told her we were going to the airport to pick him up, she went straight into her room to get her envelope for him. She couldn't wait to give it to him!!

Ris and Owen

Such a happy girl now!

Aunt Ally with her sweet boy!

Brian,
We love you so much and pray we never take for granted all the sacrifices you have made for our freedom. You are so brave and we could never thank you enough!

Amanda

Thanksgiving 2010

2010-12-13T09:56:00.005-06:00

Yes, I know I am a huge slacker on this blog. I have to admit, that we use Facebook now, and it is much easier to just give small updates there. But I love this blog and so here I am AGAIN trying to update a ton of things on one day....sorry.

Our first Thanksgiving celebration this year was at the church, the week before Thanksgiving. The older kids were gone with friends and David was working, so it was just me and the babies this year. It was so nice to spend time in fellowship with our church family. They have been such a support system for us over the last year and a half. We are so blessed to be surrounded by such love and support from them. The meal was catered and the food was so good. Abby Grace had fun running around and playing with all her friends too. Here are some pictures from the church dinner.

Please excuse the slobber!! It is out of control!

Owen with my Mammaw who is 80! So glad that she lives with my parents and can watch my kiddos as they grow! They have such a special relationship.

Owen and Chelsea, who is a dear friend of mine!! We grew up together at the church and her and her husband are pregnant! So exciting, babies everywhere!!

Pretty typical, her hanging on my leg!! Stinker.......

That's a little better.

She is looking like such a big girl!!!

Grannie with 2 of her babies.

Now we are on to actual Thanksgiving Day. We had the best day ever!!!! We had lunch at Nana and G-Pa's and spent time with our family there for the afternoon. Then we went over to Grandma's house and played for a bit before we went to my mom's house for dinner. The holidays are crazy running back and forth between all the houses, BUT I wouldn't trade it for the world!! We are no more than 5-10 minutes away from everyone in the family and I'm so thankful for that. My kids are surrounded by grandparents and aunts and uncles that love them, and plenty of cousins to get into mischief with! They are SO lucky.

And here is our attempt at a Christmas Card picture. FAIL!!!!!

Hope that all of you had the best day as well! We have so much to be thankful for.

Amanda

Catch up, updates, and Croup

2010-12-12T10:34:00.005-06:00

The plan is to post multiple times this morning so I can catch up the blog. There have been SO MANY exciting things going on around here I just can't not post about them. Our family is blessed beyond measure and we are so thankful. First I will give a medical update on both little ones to get that out of the way.

Abby Grace seems to be doing well still and we are very pleased with results of her surgery. However, lately she has been complaining A LOT of pain in her legs and arms which could be one of a few things: 1. an issue with her Chiari. (honestly I am not too concerned about that but that is usually a side effect from Chiari issues, before repair). 2. It could be related to the fact that she is still having all the central apnea and her limbs are not getting the proper amount of oxygen at night. One day it will catch up with her body I'm sure, just never know when. Or #3. She could be having just plain old NORMAL growing pains!!! I am really leaning towards this, but I am going to let her neurologist and neurosurgeon aware, JUST IN CASE they are concerned. But in all honesty, I think everything is completely fine.

Owen boy is doing awesome off of his oxygen and honestly I think we will be able to return the pulse ox monitor and oxygen tanks after we see his pulmonary doctor on the 15th. Such great news!! I am ready for them to be gone!! Although it's funny how that pulse ox monitor begins to give you a sense of security. It would be strange to have a baby that wasn't on one at this point.

Developmentally he seems to be completely caught up for his age and that thrills my heart more than I can say. He is still doing therapy and honestly, I think I am going to stop their services soon. As a mom, it is difficult to hear EVERY WEEK what he isn't doing or how he needs to be stronger. I feel that he is doing awesome and my pediatrician completely agrees with me. So I feel no need to continue using them if he is doing so well on his own. Haven't come to that decision yet just something we are praying about right now.

He is still on the thickened feeds to help with aspiration, and it also helps a lot with his reflux. His dietitian is coming next week so I am going to ask when we try to wean him from it, to see if he still needs it. Obviously we will continue for as long as we have to, but I don't want to give it, if he doesn't need it. I am so thankful for all the progress he has made over the last month. He is so strong and cuddly at the same time. Love him so so much!!!! BTW, at his 6 month check up he was 18 lbs 12 oz and 29 ounces long!!! Yes, he is enormous!! I call him Moose :)

Here is a video of him right after he came out of anesthesia from his MRI. He was still a little out of it, but he was being so sweet I had to video him. He was calling for Daddy.

Told you it was cute!!

Tyler woke up Wednesday morning with the NASTIEST loudest cough you have ever heard, so I kept him home from school and made an appointment with the pedi for 4:30 in the afternoon. As luck would have it, I also woke up sick and had to go to the doctor for antibiotic shot. While we were at my doctors appointment Tyler started to get MUCH worse and was having a hard time breathing. I went right home to get his inhaler and that, nor a breathing treatment did any good. Needless to say I took him straight to the doctor because I wasn't comfortable waiting until 4:30. Doctor came in and heard his cough and said he has croup for sure. She gave him a steroid shot to try and keep his airway open, but was concerned that it would still get worse because of his asthma. She was worried we would end up in the hospital if he did get worse. Well, thank goodness we didn't have to go to TCH but oh my word his cough isn't still awful. Also, croup is very contagious and luckily Owen, or the girls haven't gotten it. I was scared to death Owen would get it, but thank you Jesus, he is fine. We have used more than our fair share of germ x and bleach wipes this week though.

Keep checking back as I will be updating more as the day goes on!

Love,
Amanda

2010-11-25T00:10:00.001-06:00

Monday morning when I arrived to the hospital for Owen's MRI, I met another mom and her little boy who was about 6 or so at the elevator. He was walking and playing his DS at the same time, and actually reminded me of Ty a little. I use the word "met" very loosely, we actually only arrived there at the same time. The particular elevators that we needed to use did not open until 6 am which is exactly when we were due to check in for the MRI. We had to hang out in the same area for about 10 minutes until they would work. Anyhow at 6, we both rode the elevators up to the 4th floor and then I realized that we were both checking in for MRI. Normally they do the youngest patients first since they are required to be NPO for so long prior, so honestly I thought it strange that her kiddo had such an early appointment since he was so big. I was so wound up and stressed over Owen that I didn't give much more thought to it and just went on fretting about my own baby; too consumed in my own situation to notice theirs. I also was so consumed with myself that I didn't even find it odd that her son was wearing a beanie on his head and it was about 85 degrees and ridiculously humid Monday morning.

A bit later when we were in our little rooms where you wait before MRI, I saw her precious son walk by without his hat, and he had only patches of hair on his head. Remnants from chemo therapy and evidence a family trying to fight a horrific disease, called CANCER. I felt like I had been punched in the stomach. Yet again, I pushed it aside to worry over Owen. But something in the back of my mind just wouldn't let me forget his sweet face all day long, and even now.

You see, Owen's MRI never was to determine if he would LIVE or DIE. Owen's MRI was looking for an issue that is FIXABLE through surgery. A Major operation yes; but FIXABLE nonetheless. While I was worrying over all my selfish issues, that sweet mother was worrying what the outcome of her son's LIFE. HIS LIFE. Those are powerful words that are so much more than just words. Waiting to know if his cancer had returned. Possibly waiting to know if he would live or if he would die.

I don't know what that feels like and for that I am thankful, but my heart aches for that mom and what she must be going through. I know that my son will live and the situation in their house could be very different tonight. It rocks me to the core to even think about. There is such a selfish and undeserving feeling that comes with that. I cried the whole way home from the hospital because I almost didn't feel like I deserved to take my baby home. Such a hard thing to wrap my head around and even harder to explain.

Today I am praying for that sweet family and praying they got their Thanksgiving wish. I pray that their sweet boy's body is free from EVERY cancer cell. I wish I had asked their name, but would you please pray for them too?

As far as my family goes, this year I am thankful we will all be together to celebrate. I am thankful that we will be spending MUCH less time at the hospital in the coming year. I am thankful for bickering kiddos and piles of laundry. I am thankful to be just living life even with its chaos and messes.

I am praying for an awesome day for you and your families.

Amanda

24 Hours

2010-11-22T19:39:00.007-06:00

Tonight, all I can say is, WOW it is crazy how your perspective can change in just 24hours. Attitude is a big deal and it matters, and apparently I needed an adjustment and a new outlook if you will.

Last night and for MANY DAYS now, I have been in absolute despair over my babies and what I was going to do to help them. How could I figure this out? How could I make things better? How could I know that they would be alright all through the night? What could I do to see that they were getting the best care possible and we were aggressively doing EVERYTHING in our power to make them breath all night long?

I realized something this evening and I feel more at peace than I have in months.

These are not my babies, they are HIS. HE knew their every breath before they were even in my womb. He knew they would each have their struggles and isn't surprised by any of this. Even though I love them SO much it hurts, that could NEVER compare to HIS love for them. And if I am being completely honest with myself, all of the oxygen and alarms in the entire world would not stop them from taking their last breath if that was HIS will and HIS plan.

Not that I think they are dying or anything, but what I am trying to say is I cannot do this on my own. It not in my hands, none of it and I need to learn to let go and let God. This evening it is almost like I have physically felt the Holy Spirit telling me to JUST REST. It is like He is saying, "That is enough Amanda. Now that you are so worn down and physically cannot bear one more thing, just let me be God. Let me take care of the babies I created and you just trust me" So that is what I am going to do. I am finished with all of the hours and hours of internet research. I am finished not being able to eat because I am so sick with worry. And I am going to live and enjoy these babies, for the time will pass so quickly.

With all that being said, I got the results of Owen's MRI and it is completely normal and clear!! There is no sign of Chiari or even the start of one. I have to be honest and say that at first I was very upset that it was clear because that means we still don't have an answer for all of this apnea, still more "I don't knows". BUT, that's okay, because I don't need a reason. I need to trust God and believe in my heart that He knows what is best for my family long before I do, and HE has all the answers.

Yes, I know this doesn't seem like the same mom who posted last night that "I am done and cannot do this for one more day". I promise it is still me. :) As I said A LOT can change in 24 hours.

Seriously, I needed your prayers today more than I even knew. I love you all so much and I am one blessed momma to have so many people praying over me.

Amanda

Breathing Tube it out!!!

2010-11-22T10:28:00.003-06:00

Owen did awesome under the anesthesia and did not require the tube that went all the way down his airway. YAY again. Thank you Lord!!!

He is awake and quite happy if I do say so myself. He had 4 oz of pedialyte and 5 oz of formula. We have seen many smiles and he even talked to Daddy on the phone. It was the sweetest thing EVER!! I will post video of it later. He kept saying "DaDa DaDa" I know it made David so happy to hear his sweet voice since he can't be here with us today.

He was already able to be extubated when I got to him, so I didn't even have the see him on the ventilator this time. I am so thankful for that. His lungs do not sound junky at all like they did last time so I'm hoping that he will not get what the call "strider" and require the steroids. Thank you all so much for your prayers this morning. I cannot tell you all how much it means to have such an awesome support system.

The next few hours are key. Keep prayign that things stay the same.

All my love,
Amanda

MRI just started

2010-11-22T08:01:00.003-06:00

Owen is now sleeping under his anesthesia and the MRI is starting about now. The anesthesiologist is going to try using a different breathing tube that doesn't go all the way into his vocal cords. He will still be on the ventilator but hopefully he won't have the problems afterwards that woudl require him to have the steroid medication. They could possibly still have to put the other tube in that goes all the way down, but want to try going the other route first.

If he can not be extubated immediately we will have to go to the PICU, however I am hoping that is not the case. From what I have been told if things go well we will be admitted to the 14th floor, which is pulmonary. That way they can monitor his airways closely to see if he will have the complications.

Thanks so much for praying over my sweet boy today. I am praying for answers and wisdom over the doctors. Love to all.

For some reason my facebook messages are not coming to my phone so I may not be able to respond right away to everyone.

Amanda

Tomorrow's MRI

2010-11-21T22:04:00.000-06:00

I do have results from Owen's sleep study, as well as Abby Grace's but I am too emotionally drained to post them tonight. But please keep praying over that situation, and where God is going to lead regarding the direction we will go, as far as their medical care in concerned.

I wanted to give a quick update about tomorrow and Owen's brain scan. I spoke with the nurse on Friday who was calling to confirm that we would be there for the MRI and she had no idea about any of his history. That quick confirmation call turned into an hour long conversation in which she had to page to anesthesiologist and the radiologist!! Anyhow, Owen will FOR SURE have to be intubated for the MRI tomorrow morning and we will be admitted into the hospital instead of being an outpatient procedure. Because they could not extubate him for over 6 hours last time, there is a chance that tomorrow will be the same situation. Also, he required steroid medication for his airway because it was very swollen and irritated from the intubation, which from what I understand is pretty common. So, they want to make sure everything will be all good BEFORE we go home.

My mom is taking off work to be with me and we have to be there at 6 am. YUCK!! MRI is scheduled to begin at 7:30 so I will have a VERY unhappy boy on my hands, since he can't eat after midnight tonight. He does NOT like to be hungry that's for sure.

I will not sugar coat things tonight about all of this........

I am tired. I am weary. I want my babies to breath like they should in the night. I want to know that things are anatomically correct in their precious brains. I want answers. My heart hurts. I am tired of searching the Internet for hours on end. I love them so much that it hurts and I just want this to be over. I am done. I know I have reached a point where I need a really good long cry and I can feel it coming. But no time for that now, I have bags to pack..........

I know there are so many moms with babies much sicker than mine so I don't want to seem like all i am doing is complaining. This is just where I am tonight. Tomorrow is a new day and I know I will be blanketed in prayer by my awesome family and friends. There are days where you all carry me and tomorrow will be no exception to that. I will have my computer at the hospital and will be updating as I can. Love to all.

Amanda

A Day at the Salon

2010-11-15T09:44:00.005-06:00

Abby Grace had been on her best behavior for a few days and I had promised her a special treat. We had to go to the mall to buy a specific blanket for Owen so I figured I would let her get a haircut at the salon inside the mall. She was SOOO excited. It was only her second haircut of her life and I was sweating when she was sitting in the chair.
Here is her "BEFORE" picture.

Leaning back like such a big girl

Cutting is all done, and I am realizing how short it is; starting to panic a little.

As you can see, she was MORE THAN pleased with the results. When she looked in the mirror the first thing she said was,"I definately look about 14". Seriously, this child is too funny!!

I loved watching her look in the mirror and be so happy with the reflection she saw. I pray she always sees how beautiful she is as she grows older.

On another note, her hair is now completely even with what had grown out from her surgery last year. Now, there is almost no way to tell it even happened; except for the emotional scars for momma! HA.

Have a great Monday everyone!

Medical Update Abby Grace & Owen

2010-11-12T14:13:00.003-06:00

There have been so many medical things I need to update on with both kiddos that I don't even know where to begin. But I need to catch everyone up to speed, and plus I like to look back on these things later.

About a month or so ago, we learned that Abby Grace has a hole in her left eardrum that will require surgery to repair. Her ENT has been monitoring it closely to make sure it hasn't changes or grown any. The hole is a significant size, however when we went back to see him yesterday, he said that because she still gets so many ear infections he doesn't want to repair the hole, only to have to put a tube back in, if her infections persist. So it can wait to be repaired until she is about 6 or 7, as long as it doesn't get any bigger. I breathed a sigh of relief and am thankful at that we can deal with that later.

Abby Grace had another sleep study a few weeks ago and I honestly wasn't worried about it too much. When I got the results I was shocked to the core to say the least. Her central apnea is not ANY better than it was before her brain surgery. I WAS ABSOLUTELY SICK OVER IT!!! I really thought it was better and I don't know how to explain it other than, there has been SO much going on with Owen that Abby Grace just "HAD" to be better, in my mind. That probably doesn't make much sense, but I have just been in survival mode I guess. Basically she stops breathing every 10 to 12 minutes all night long for and average of 30 seconds each time. The longest span she went without an apnea was 15 minutes. We go back to see her neurologist in December to go over the results in detail, so I am assuming we will make SOME plan of action at that time. That causes me to re-consider MANY things regarding her medical care that I will get to at a later day.

Owen has his sleep study at TCH tonight and I am dreading it honestly. I am getting weary on this journey, but I know that tomorrow is a new day and I was never promised the life would be easy. Anyhow, tonight we are praying that Owen will get into a deep REM sleep for a long time so they can get the information they need. I am really hoping his central apnea has improved at least a little from what it was while we were in NICU. He is still on his oxygen and pulse ox machine and has been holding his sat's very well as of late. But his sat's never really were the issue. The doctors are hoping that with the low flow of oxygen in his nose, that is enough to trigger his brain to send the signal to breath. Basically they are using it like a CPAP, sort of.

His repeat brain MRI is Monday morning. I have to be at the hospital by 6 am and I also am ready for that to be over with. Right now I am praying that they don't have to intubate him for the anesthesia. My sweet baby on a ventilator is a sight I hope to NEVER see again. Part of me hopes there is chiari so we KNOW what is causing all of his apnea. Don't get me wrong, I don't exactly want to go through brain surgery again, HOWEVER it is absolutely consuming and eats me alive to know that both Abby Grace and Owen have all of this apnea and we can't figure out why. I am constantly on the internet, searching and reading. I feel like it is my job to learn what is going on and make sure we get on the right path to fix it. I can't explain it, and it is hard for even my husband to understand. I hate going to bed knowing that 2 of my kids stop breathing all through the night. It is the most awful feeling.

Okay, I think that is all for now. I will post results as soon as I know something. Love to all and thanks for praying.

Amanda

For OUR Soldier

2010-11-11T22:10:00.007-06:00

****Posting multiple times tonight, so keep scrolling down to keep up!!***

Veteran's Day takes on a whole new meaning when you have someone in your family who is actively serving in the military, or for me it did anyway. My brother in law Brian is currently overseas right now finishing up his second tour for the United States Army. He is due to be home before Christmas and we will all breath a sigh of relief when he is on American soil once again. Our family is so thankful that the Lord has protected every hair on his head while he has been gone and we are so blessed.

I will never know what it is like to be thousands of miles away from my family and literally risk my life in a foreign land. I will never have to witness some of the things our soldiers are seeing daily and will never forget. But I will continue to wake up every morning and enjoy the freedoms that I have because of HERO'S like my brother. May I never take my every day luxuries for granted again.

Brian, we love you so much and cannot wait until you and Ally Rae are in each other's arms again!!
Amanda

A Trip to the Zoo

2010-11-11T21:35:00.004-06:00

***I am "catching up" on blogging tonight so be sure and read the posts below if you want to catch up***

During our NICU journey with Owen, I met some of the most wonderful people that I now consider some of my dearest friends. One of those people was Anessa, Owen's primary day nurse. She took such good care of him and loved him just like one of her own kiddos. Anyhow, we talk regularly and decided to get together outside the walls of TCH, so we ventured out to the Houston Zoo. She brought her son Ethan, who is so beautiful!!! I wanted to keep him, but Anessa likes him a little bit :) Here are some pictures from our adventure.

The weather was PERFECT and it was such an awesome day!! Thank you Anessa for the invite. Can't wait to get together again my sweet friend.
Amanda

Happy (SERIOUSLY BELATED) Halloween!!

2010-11-11T21:27:00.001-06:00

**I am blogging multiple posts tonight, so be sure and scroll down if you want to catch up**

For Halloween this year we has 2 Army men and 2 Wonder Womans (or Womens?). Anyhow, it was BY FAR my most favorite Halloween as far as costumes are concerned. The kids all looked AWESOME. David had a minor heart attack when he saw the eyeliner and mascara on Kayli but eventually recovered. We went to the carnival at our church and had an awesome time. Hope you enjoy the pictures.

This wonder woman was worn out after a long day of saving the world!! HA!

Amanda

She is growing up........

2010-11-11T21:07:00.000-06:00

***For some reason I never published this post. I wrote it on the night before Kayli started the 6 grade.*****

So, I have about a trillion things to blog about but I have a heavy heart tonight, and I need to just get this out on "paper" so I can think more clearly and reflect. Does the Holy Spirit LEAD you to a particular blog post? HA, not sure about that.........but I seriously cannot get this off my mind so here we are.

When David and I started dating Kayli had just started kindergarten. She was a tiny, shy, beautiful little girl, and in many ways remains the same. Tomorrow morning my beautiful Kayli will be starting junior high and I absolutely cannot believe it. What has happened to these last 6 years? The reality of her getting older has left me to think heavily on things and really open my eyes to things I have been putting off, as a parent.

Growing up (and still now) I am a HUGE procrastinator.......seriously, my mind works better that way. Always in school, I would cram for tests at the VERY last minute and ace them. I would clean my room after my Mom had told me 327 times to do so (sorry mom), only because I knew it was my LAST chance before she would be super mad. When I was a working gal, reports would always go in right on time, but man would I wait until the last minute to start. It's almost like my brain doesn't get into high hear until the pressure is really up. (And honestly, my brain probably doesn't work any better, I just have made myself believe that over the years.) It is a lifestyle I should work on changing.

With that being said, what have I "put off" as her Momma? Have I prepared her for this journey she is about to be on? I want her to know that I love her with all my heart and that she can talk to me about anything. Have I shown her that? Have I raised her in a way that is pleasing to the Lord?

It is very scary to me to think that over half of the time she will spend living in my house has already passed. There will come a day that she will be grown and it really isn't too far. Today, I cut her hair and painted her fingernails to get ready for her first day. It was just her and I at home, so it was awesome to have some alone time with her. We talked for a long time and I enjoy her company so much as her personality is changing from little girl to teenager.

I don't want to "put off" praying with her every day, or always telling her how beautiful she is and how proud I am of her. I love her with my whole being and I am so blessed that God has allowed be to be her Momma.

Amanda

Bring on the pictures!!!

2010-10-08T09:36:00.006-05:00

So, since I haven't updated in about a trillion years, I figured it would be best to show a bunch of pictures and update in bullet form, because well that's just easiest for me.

The latest on Owen:
~He is 4 1/2 months old already and growing like you wouldn't believe!!! He is a momma's boy and I am completely smitten with him, no lie....
~He is still on oxygen support and pulse ox monitor 24 hours a day.
~At this time we still do not know what is causing the apnea, but the low flow of oxygen in his nose is enough to "remind" his little brain to breath, for now.
~On November 22 he will have a brain MRI to see if he has Chiari like Abby Grace. We are praying for God's will over that situation.
~We learned last week that he is not aspirating so it is safe for him to eat by mouth, HUGE praise!!!
~He has therapy at the house 6 times per month and it is really helping with his development. He is starting to reach and grab for things, although he still will not use his legs at all. That is concerning to me right now but our therapist tells me not to worry just yet.
~He has big blue eyes, loves to coo and laugh, and is generally the happiest baby I have ever seen.

The latest on Abby Grace:
~Her headaches are now few and far between, and her neurosurgeon expects her to lead a full and normal life. I am still in awe at what a miracle she is.
~Hopefully she will be getting another sleep study before the end of the year so we can see where we stand with her apnea and how that is going since her surgery.
~She is SOOOO ready to start school and I consider her to be developmentally right on track for her age if not a little ahead.
~Almost knows all her letters and what sounds they make; and can identify all 1 digit numbers.
~She loves her little brother SOO much. I'm so thankful God gave us Owen, so AG could be a big sister. It fits her SOO well.
~Her world is full of pretend right now and I love it. We pretend to be different people all day and it is such fun.

Tyler:
~Ty is doing awesome in school!!! He is in the advanced classes this year and breezing right through.
~He is on this reading kick lately, and every time I turn around he is finishing one book and starting the next. I was the EXACT same way at his age!!
~He has started to pitch some in baseball and is doing really well for his first season at it. Let me tell you, that grin on his face from the pitching mound is the sweetest thing ever. Makes this momma proud!!!
~He is always trying to do little things to make me feel special and it is so sweet. He puts notes on my pillow and ALWAYS hold open the door for me. He will make a great husband someday (A VERY LONG TIME FROM NOW!!!!!).

Kayli Bug:
~She is doing SOOO awesome in junior high and LOVES the freedom!! I swear she thinks she is a real teenager now :) (I guess I better brace myself bc that day is coming faster than I would like)
~She is taking all advances classes this year as well, and is doing great with the extra load. I was worried how she would do, but shame on me because she has been great.
Still playing softball for the select team and she amazes me with her athletic abilities that did NOT come from me. HA!!
~She is the best big sister ever. God knew what he was doing when He made her the first born. She is always making sure everyone is taken care of and has everything they need for the day, including me!! I love her so much and love the age she is right now.

David and I are both doing very well. He is super busy with work and then going back and forth to baseball and softball almost every day. It's hard to believe that we will be married for 5 years this coming February. I am so thankful for him and how hard he works to support our family. He is truly my best friend and I'm so happy at where our marriage is right now. It has taken a lot of trials and heartache to get where we are now and I wouldn't trade any of it now. Love you babe!!

If I could ask you to pray, I will be having a brain MRI next Thursday to make sure there is no Chiari. Please pray with us over that situation. I really have a peace about it but I know that as it gets closer I will be very nervous.

Amanda

NICU Day 6

2010-09-05T12:06:00.000-05:00

I will start this post by addressing an issue that some of you probably don't have a clue what I am talking about and that is fine; feel free to skip on to the next paragraph. First, I will be disabling anonymous comments from my blog. I always assumed that people who read this blog are people who love us and have prayed for us along our journey with Abby Grace and now Owen and that is clearly not the case. I find is very sad that another mom who supposedly walked the NICU journey for so long would be so quick to judge and be critical of another mom who is obviously going through a hard time. Your accusation was not even based on facts and I do not appreciate you commenting, hiding behind your computer screen and being hurtful on purpose. How unfair for you to assume I was careless and not diligent in Owen's care. Many many nights I have stayed awake to make sure he (and Abby Grace for that matter) was breathing, not that I owe you an explanation. People who know me, know that you are dead wrong. Frankly, if you don't like this blog I invite you to click the tiny X on the top of your screen and move right along to another blog that suits you better.

Now then............. I'm so sorry everyone. Moving right along.

Tuesday morning Abby Grace had an appointment for her 4 year check up at the pediatrician. We were getting ready to go and I had a nagging feeling to go and check on Owen. We had already taken the older kids to school and been back home, and he was taking a morning nap in his crib. I walked over to his crib and his body was completely blue and he wasn't breathing at all. Insert moment of panick here. Let's just say that all the other times I thought he was blue before, I assure you he was not. This time he was blue and all over. I jerked him out of his crib to put him on the floor so I could start CPR. All I could think in that moment was, Jesus please let me remember how to do this. Don't let him be dead in my arms. The stimulation of me grabbign him from the crib and putting him on the floor was enough for him to start breathing again on his own. Thank you Jesus so so much. I immediately put him back on his oxygen and our moody pulse ox machine, so I could see where his sat's were. Mid 80's and climbing. He popped back up to normal range and was alright again. Our pedi is a Texas Children's Dr so we went straight there.

Let me stop there to say that Owen was not on his oxygen at the time of this episode because he had a normal OCRG a few weeks ago and his pulmonary doctor took him off, except at night. We have had many problems with our home health care company regarding Owen's pulse ox machine not working properly. It doesn't pick up a good wave pattern and will read numbers that are not even close to correct. So he was not on that either. I have felt incredibly guilty over this and I'm telling you it can eat you alive. All I could think was, "how long had he been laying there not breathing" or "what if I hadn't gone to check on him". When it comes to being a mom, we are our toughest critic for sure. I honestly think it is an aweful mind game that Satan plays with moms and I need to learn to recognize it and push it aside RIGHT AWAY.

Anyhow, the pediatrician was not comfortable with these things still happening, and after he spoke with out pulmonologist they both felt it was best to come to TCH for more tests and evaluation. So, I think that just abotu catches you all up to now. They have ordered another sleep study adn we will not be going home until we get results from that. Half of the study will be done with oxygen and half without. They want to know if the low flow of oxygen he is on is enough to prevent his apneas. If it is, then great we will stick with that method of treatment. If not, then we will possibly be moving towards a C-PAP machine while he is sleeping. I do not really want to go that route, so please be praying for that. Also, we are getting a new pulse ox machine, and he wil have an apnea monitor as well. He will be on pulse ox all the time, but only the apnea monitor while sleeping. In the apnea monitor, there is a download capability so we have the ability to track his history and see when things start to improve.

We do know that he isn't quite ready to wean from the oxygen so we are back at that all the time. He has not had one episode since we have been here that either leads us to 1 of 2 conclusions: 1. The low flow of oxygen is enough to prevent this from happening. Or #2 He is not getting into the same deep sleep here, that he is at home. So we just wait and see what happens. We will re-evaluate and really make another plan for treatment after we get results of the sleep study. Thank you all soo much for loving my family and always being so encouraging. May you all be blessed a million times over for lifting us up in prayer.
Amanda

We are still alive!!!

2010-08-26T21:26:00.002-05:00

I know, I am quite possibly the WORST blogger in blogging history. I am so sorry, really I am. My days are now consumed with nursing, carpools, packing lunches, nursing again, checking homework, cooking in the crock pot (seriously, I am obsessed), more nursing, and I couldn't be happier!!!

Kayli and Ty started school this week and everything is going smoothly. I was a big girl and very brave on Kayli's first day of junior high. :) In all seriousness, she LOVES junior high and I am so proud of her. Ty is settling in as well; although not thrilled about the homework...........but he will live. Baseball and softball have started again and we now have commitments every day of the week. Welcome to the chaos and I was ready for the routine.

Abby Grace will be 4 on Monday and the thought of that is absolutely nauseating to me. My little toddler is nothing of the sort these days. All of her baby chub and roundness is long gone and she really looks like a big girl. SO.VERY.SAD. We saw Dr. Jea (neurosurgeon) last week and he is so proud of her progress and has released her for another 6 months. He says as long as there are no sudden changes, she will go on to lead a completely normal life. I now consider that journey a thing of the past and it was so surreal to hear that. I still can't believe it.

Owen is doing awesome and making improvements every day. He is off his oxygen completely during the day, YAY!!! He is cooing and moving around his arms and legs like crazy. All things, we were told he would not do for a long time. Oh the power of prayer my friends, the power of prayer. He has therapy 6 times per month and it is going really well. He still will not bear any weight on his legs, but it will come when he is ready. Nonetheless, I am thankful for every moment with him and I JUST MIGHT be wrapped around his tiny finger 27 times or 28.

I am so behind on blogging so please bare with me for a few days while I make an attempt to catch up. More to come tomorrow, I promise. Here is a video from today of Owen's first laugh. It just might be the sweetest thing EVER!!! Ignore my ridiculous baby talk in the background. Goodnight all. 6 am comes SOOO early!!!

Amanda

I Remember- Brain Surgery 1 Year Later

2010-08-01T20:29:00.013-05:00

I remember the day we found out Abby Grace had Chiari Malformation and would have to have brain surgery. I remember talking with Stacy a very dear friend, and we both cried. I remember telling her, "I can't do this. I don't want this story, please God give it to someone else. Not my baby, please. Give this testimony to someone else who is stronger, I can't do it." I was pleading with the Lord to take it all away and assuring Him that I wasn't capable of surviving such a valley.

July 27 was the 1 year anniversary of Abby Grace's brain surgery. I remember the day just as if it were yesterday, but in some ways it feels like it was a lifetime ago. I remember we left our house at 4:30 am to be at the hospital by 5 and I was still very much handicapped from the viscous snake bite. I remember I was completely sick to my stomach but I also had a peace over me that I can't explain. I remember the smell of the running cars waiting to be valet parked in front of the hospital when we arrived. I remember having a vision in my head of the nurses pulling her from my arms, crying to take her to the OR...and that is not at all how it happened. I remember her picking out a PINK Little Tykes car, and driving herself to the OR, WITH A SMILE!!! I remember sitting with family and dear friends waiting and waiting for hours. I remember reading precious hand made cards from little children at our church. I remember Dr. Jea coming out to tell us that surgery was a success and me hugging his neck and crying. I remember seeing my baby for the first time and holding her in my arms. I remember, my entire world coming to a stop and the only thing that mattered in that moment was holding my sweet girl. I remember how difficult the days after surgery were supposed to be. She might not walk, she might not talk, be able to feed herself, or even know who I was right away.

But I remember, my sweet girl DID know her momma, she DID talk, and she DID even walk just 48 hours after surgery!!

But out of all the things I remember most about that time, it is this that I will never forget: I remember that my Sweet Jesus carried me EVERY step of the way. He held me when I thought I couldn't take one more step. He gave me a loving, supportive husband who knows exactly what I need, most of the time before I do. He strengthened my marriage at a time that it could have been torn apart. He gave us the best families we could ever ask for. He sent church friends our way just at the right time; to prepare meals, send a card, or most importantly pray on our behalf. He gave us great companies to work for, that gave us time off to take care of Abby Grace after surgery and also organized huge benefits to help with medical expenses.

So as difficult, scary and heartbreaking that that time may have been, I honestly wouldn't trade a second of it. I am so thankful God chose me to be Abby Grace's momma. I am so thankful we have the story we do. She is a miracle and I cannot wait until she is old enough to really understand how awesome that is.

The video below, is her first steps after surgery. Brings tears to my eyes every time I see it.

Family Reunion 2010

2010-07-31T20:41:00.006-05:00

A few days after we came home from Florida, the kids and I left for my family reunion. David stayed home because he had to work, adn let me tell you it was so much harder traveling without him!! Anyhow, that side of the family has not seen my kids in 2 years so I was really excited to go. We didn't go last year because it was right before Abby Grace's surgery and we stayed home. Anyhow, I couldn't believe how big everyone else's kids had gotten! My cousin Jennifer had the reunion at her house this year, at it was so beautiful. Everyone had such a great time.
Also, I got to see my cousin Terry and her daughter Emily whom I hadn't seen in probably 10 years, maybe longer. Anyhow, she has kept up with our blog and prayed many hours over Abby Grace and Owen. She was so excited to finally meet them in person. I know her church also prays for them and she was glad to be able to give him an update on how Owen was doing. I know there are so many people who read our blog from all over that don't ever comment. Whether I know you follow us or not, I know the Lord hears your prayers for our family and I appreciate every one.

Here are some pictures from the trip:

2010 Softball World Series- Panama City Beach Florida

2010-07-31T19:16:00.009-05:00

Kayli's softball team played in the World Series this summer in Panama City Beach Florida. They gave 110% and did such a great job. They placed 17th out of 86 teams and we couldn't have been more proud of them. Also, we got a vacation out of the deal, which was a total bonus. We had never been to Florida as a family before and had a blast. Here are some pictures from the trip.....

Update on Owen

2010-07-31T18:35:00.004-05:00

We are finally back from all our traveling, and I have TONS to update on this neglected blog. But first, I wanted to let you all know the latest on our sweet boy.

We had an appointment with our new pediatrician last week, and I really liked him. Owen is 2 months old now, can you believe it?? He weighs 12 lbs and 9 oz and is 24 1/2 inches long. He is such a big boy!!! From a medical standpoint we are still waiting on results from the major things they were testing for. However, I am not the least bit concerned about any of them. His muscles have gotten so much stronger and it is an absolute joy to watch him grow and change. This stregnth is a direct result of your prayers and I wish you could all see him for yourselves. He is moving his arms and legs so much and even starting to coo and smile. It is so precious and nothing short of a miracle. If you had seen him at his worst, you just wouldn't believe the improvement!! Thank you Jesus!!!

He is still on the oxygen and pulse ox monitor and will be for some time. There have been a few instances we have had to turn the oxygen up during the night because of some apnea spells, but that is to be expected with the amount of apnea he is having. He has also been brady a few times (his heart rate was too low) but that as well is to be expected. Overall, we are getting used to traveling with all the equipment and waking up to his alarms during the night.

As far as the question on whether Owen is going to be special needs, I still am okay with that, if that is God's plan. I do feel like there have been drastic improvements in those areas, but we will have to wait and see. His physical therapy and occupational therapy starts next week. They will be coming to our house, so at least I don't have to go anywhere for those appointments. However they are coming at 8 am which is WAY earlier than we prefer to get up, but who is complaining!!!

We have follow up appointments with all of our specialist at Texas Children's in the next 2 weeks, so I will keep the updates on those coming. And last but not least, here are some recent pictures of Big O...............

2010-07-22T22:15:00.011-05:00

? hen we get back. Love you all so much and I can't wait for you to see new pictures of this sweet boy. He was 2 months old yesterday!!! I am so sad. XOXO

2010-07-22T22:15:00.009-05:00

? l eating great and growing like a champ!!!! We leave again tomorrow morning for my family reunion and will be back Sunday. I will have so much to post w

2010-07-22T22:15:00.007-05:00

? gen is still preventing him from turning blue, however we have had to turn the flow up a little higher to keep his sat's where they should be. He is stil

2010-07-22T22:15:00.005-05:00

? eing together and it was totally worth the FOREVER drive. Owen did awesome and I am actually getting used to traveling with all this equipment. The oxy

2010-07-22T22:15:00.003-05:00

? id SO awesome in the tournament. I have so many pictures to post but I haven't even taken them off the camera yet. We all had such an awesome time just b

2010-07-22T22:15:00.001-05:00

? Heck I already messed up!!!! This could be an adventure. Anyhow, I wanted to let you all know that we made it back from Florida safely and Kayli's team d

2010-07-22T22:03:00.001-05:00

Okay so this is my first attempt at blogging from my cell phone, so we'll see how this works.....

Big O update...

2010-07-21T13:14:00.002-05:00

Hey this is David just trying to update y'all faithfull followers.... We got home from Florida Monday about 1:30 in the morning, so it has been a little hectic for Manda not having been home in a month.

Owen is doing good... He and his new found traveling companions... Oxygen, and O2 moniter are a test... He has to be on the oxygen 24/7, along with his pulse ox monitor. He is eating well, and getting quite big I must say. He is a blessing to our family, reguardless of the road ahead. We have seen speed bumps in the road and will continue too. God is great and he will help us thru all obsticles, and heal our second miracle baby...

I hope Manda to update everyone tonight, like I said it has been a little hectic... Owen has his 2 month Pedi appointment today so she will be going to that soon... We appreciate all the prayers, and continued prayers...

Florida was great and Bug's softball team did great... Ty enjoyed the pool, as did Abby Grace... Beach's were beautiful, as was Florida for the most part.... Drive was long... but well worth it...

Again I will try and get Manda to update y'all a little better tonight... Thanks again for the prayers, and we hope they will be continued...

David

Day 19-Discharge Here We Come!!

2010-07-10T09:43:00.002-05:00

So this very long journey has come to an end!!! The meeting with Owen's doctor's went fabulous yesterday. So far every single test they have run, has come back negative, which is a huge blessing. Yes, that means we are leaving with no answer, however it also means things are improving enough to go home!!! The discharge papers are being prepared and we are outta here!! I promise to update with details soon, but I won't be blogging for a few days after we leave. I want to spend all of my time with my babies and making summer memories we should have been doing for the past 3 weeks.

I love you all so very much. It means the world to me that you love my family so much and are quick to be on your knees for us in time of need. I would be honored to do the same for you and your families.

All my love and gratitude,
Amanda

NICU Day 18

2010-07-09T11:53:00.002-05:00

All I ever wanted to be "when I grew up" was a mother. Now that I have grown up, it is my favorite responsibility and I wouldn't trade it for the world. It brings me immeasurable joy, however it can also be the most difficult and heartbreaking job. Yesterday was one of those heartbreaking days for me and I have to say it was worse than Abby Grace's brain surgery for sure.

Owen was scheduled for his spinal MRI first thing yesterday morning. The anesthesiologist was not particularly friendly and I didn't feel good about it from the beginning. I was told Owen would have to be intubated for the procedure and there was no avoiding it. The thought of my sweet baby being on a ventilator did not sit with me well and I was so very close to pulling him off the schedule and not doing it at all. I thought it was just nerves so I signed consent and waited with Owen until he was asleep.

The MRI was almost 2 hours and then we had to go to the level 3 NICU where the more critical patients are. He would be allowed to go back down to level 2 once he was off the ventilator and breathing on his own. Nothing on this entire planet could have prepared me for seeing my angel on a ventilator. It is an image forever etched in my memory that has changed me for certain. I sobbed at thinking I had actually given permission for this. I am the reason there is a machine breathing for my son. Normally they come off the ventilator within an hour but it was over 5 hours before he was breathing on his own. By far the longest, most agonizing 5 hours of my life.

After he was extabated, he was breathing fine other than being really hoarse and congested from the breathing tube. He was monitored in level 3 for a while and then we went right back to our familiar area in level 2. Just being there back with our nurses was a huge relief and very comfoting to me. They have come to love Owen in the time we have been here and there is nothing better than knowing your nurse really cares about your baby. During the night he started to show signs of inflammation in his airway and had to be given steroids and a breathing treatment. That is not uncommon in babies that have had breathing tubes. Today his throat is sore and he is crying if I'm not holding him but he is getting some tylenol in a bit.

He is getting a spinal tap in a few minutes and I think that is the last of the tests he will be getting for now. This afternoon I have a meeting with all of his doctors at 2:30. Pray that I can be clear headed and ask everything I need to know. I will update again as I can.
Amanda

NICU Day 16- Improvement!!!!

2010-07-07T23:01:00.002-05:00

Today was one of the best days we have had in a long time. The major praises of the day are:
We repeated th swallow study today, and Owen is no longer aspirating in his lungs. His milk will not have to be thickened anymore and he has already gone back to nursing. I cannot tell you how much that means to me and I am SO thankful for everyone who specifically prayed for me to be able to nurse again.
Also, Owen's muscle tone is SO MUCH stronger than before. He is kicking his arms and legs, holding up his head and tracking with his eyes. Those are huge improvements in itself and very encouraging as far as his developmental needs for the future. Because he has shown such a gain in that area it is HIGHLY unlikely he could have CCHD or SMA. The tests have already been sent off, so we will wait for the results, but improvement would not happen in patients with those disorders.
Also, yesterday we did a test to make sure the nerves and muscles were functioning properly in his arms and legs. Came back totally normal! He is very sore from it today, but we are thankful for a good answer at the end.
Tomorrow morning he will be having a MRI of the entire spine as well as a spinal tap. He will have to be put under anesthesia for the MRI and I am very uneasy about that, so please pray. There is a chance he will have to be intubated because of the breathing issues, and I would like to avoid that. I will post updates tomorrow as I have them.
I love you all so much for loving my family. I feel so undeserving to be a Momma of another miracle child. We have so much to be thankful for. Whether you cooked a meal, sent an email, or prayed I want you to know I love you and it is because of your love and prayers that we were able to get through this. We were never alone.
Amanda

NICU Day 13

2010-07-02T00:26:00.008-05:00

Yes we are still here!! I want to give a quick update on Prince Owen before I try and get some sleep. First of all, he is still the most beautiful, perfect thing on the planet. I am absolutely 100% smitten with him but I'm sure you already knew that. I'm sorry I have been so terrible about posting, the days here are filled with doctors, meetings, and pumping!! Who knew life in the NICU was so busy.

So, we have learned from our Neurological Development Dr that Owen is more than likely going to be a special needs child. We do not know the extent of that yet, however God has all those details worked out, and I will not worry over that particular issue right now. I have always had a very special place in my heart for special needs children, and if that is God's plan for our family then I will mother Owen with a loving and patient heart. There are VERY SMALL parts of me that are a little sad, but I am so thankful to be his mommy, and that gratitude will never change.

In the last few days the weakness in Owen's muscles is progressing. He is very floppy and hardly holding up his head at all or moving his limbs. There is much concern over that right now, and the doctor's are doing everything they can to try and find a cause for this. We are doing lab work on Tuesday for something called Spinal Muscular Atrophy, or SMA. Google it if you must, but I will say it is a devastating diagnosis and we do not want it to be that. We have also sent in a stool sample for infant botulism. There are less than 100 cases of that in the U.S. per year, however the babies usually make a full recovery from what I understand. On Wednesday we are doing a muscle study where they put a small needle in different muscles on his arms and legs to see if the nerve and muscle are functioning as they should. They are leaning towards a possible neuro-muscular problem right now.

Owen had a swallow study and failed it miserably. He silent aspirates a considerable amount into his lungs each time he eats. We know that he has not been doing this since birth, because he would have had pneumonia already (simply because of the amount of milk getting into his lungs). It is probably connected to the fact that is body is generally weaker than before. I am not allowed to nurse anymore because of the aspirating, and my heart is broken over that more than I could explain. There is a thickening agent being added to the breast milk and we are praying that will work. If that doesn't work we will have to move towards feeding tubes and that is not ideal.

We won't be going home until late next week at the earliest. There are a lot of results pending and honestly we will more than likely go home without a diagnosis or answer. The doctors have done their best to prepare me for that and that's okay. I can live without an answer as long as I know it is safe to bring him home and we are trying to find a cause. I know with my entire being, without a single doubt, that God has orchestrated this entire scenario for a greater purpose even if I can't see that right now. He wants me to learn something and grow, and I am making the commitment to do that.

Ecc 3:1
"To everything there is a season, and a time and purpose under Heaven...."

Amanda

Karsyn Jane

2010-07-01T02:19:00.000-05:00

Tonight, I will not update on Owen, I need a break from that..... However I will ask that tomorrow please pray for Owens's pod-mate in the NICU. Her name is Karsyn Jane, I knew you all would love her, just by the name. She is the princess of the pod, and I would take her home with me, if her mommy would let me. Every day she has on big gorgeous bows and frilly little outfits. Ever since we got here, there is something about this little girl, I just love her. Anyhow, she was born at 24 weeks and has overcome MANY obstacles. I has no idea that she was less than 2 pounds when she was born. She is literally a miracle right before my eyes. Tomorrow she is having surgery to put in a shunt, because she had a brain bleed. I know I am leaving out many things, but please just pray for her, and her parents. I chat with her sweet momma every day and I know she is so past ready to bring her angel girl home. She has been going back and forth from this place for 4 months.

Please lift up the neurosurgeon team as well. Pray the Lord will guide their every single move in the OR, pray that Karsyn will do well during and after the operation, and pray for peace for momma and daddy.

You can visit their blog at www.lifewiththebrewers.blogspot.com

Goodnight all, or I guess I should say goodmorning at this point.

Day 7 Update

2010-06-28T20:34:00.002-05:00

I struggle with putting the right words together for this post, so I will just give the short version and elaborate tomorrow. I am much too tired to do much else, and can barely form a complete sentence at this point.

I met with 2 genetics specialists today, and both are very confident that Owen is NOT suffering from Congenital Central Hyperventilation Syndrome. We still are sending the tests however, do not feel like that is the cause at this point. That is good news to me.

However when meeting with the head of neurological development today, I learned that Owen is going to be a special needs child. There are things I can do to help him along the way, both physically and developmentally, however even in doing all of those things, he is going to require special care. I am much too tired tonight to go into all the details, however I am not as upset as I thought I would be. I know down to the bottom of my heart that I serve a big God who is "Mighty To Save".

My God knew today was going to happen before the beginning of time, and He isn't shocked or rattled by this news. My precious boy is alive and I will not be leaving this hospital with empty arms as some mothers do. I am very much encouraged that I can do some things to help him along the way, and I will dedicate my life to it, if that is what it requires. Also, I am thankful we live in Texas, a state that offers SO many home health care programs to children with development delays.

Tomorrow is a new day and I am so thankful for it. I know that all of you have played a huge part in the peace I have right in this moment. Thank you for praying today and loving my family, from the bottom of my heart.

Amanda

Day 6 Update

2010-06-27T19:46:00.001-05:00

So, I don't really have an update, other than just asking you to please pray without ceasing for me tomorrow and tonight. The last 6 days are catching up to me, and I do not have time to fall apart now. My stomach is in knots, and I do not want tomorrow to come at all.

David is going to have to work, and will not be able to be here with me. He is so comforting to me in times like these, so I am dreading being here without him.

Thanks to all the new readers who left sweet comments, I could use them now for sure.

Amanda

NICU Day 6 Update

2010-06-27T14:00:00.003-05:00

Owen had an okay night last night. He did have an episode where he turned blue about 1 this morning. He also had a period where his oxygen was staying in the low 80's and high 70's about 4 this morning. Both times he needed stimulation to come back from the episode. We were hoping the oxygen was going to prevent that from happening all together, but apparently that is not the case. I am thankful that I "Just happened" to be there checking on him when it happened.

Please keep praying. I can already feel the anxiety mounting for tomorrow's appointments, and I have an overall sense of weariness. I am not trying to be negative, it is just hard today I guess. David is coming ot visit, so that will help. It has been way too long since I felt his arms around me.

The doctor has not been by the bedside today, so I am opting for no nap at Ronald McDonald house so I can be there when he comes. I will send out another update tonight. Thank you again for thinking of our family and praying.

Amanda

NICU Day 5

2010-06-26T20:31:00.003-05:00

Doesn't he just look pitiful connected to all of that for the sleep study? It broke my heart.

As you can see, the other kids got to come and visit yesterday. I was SOOO happy to see them. It was nice to have all my babies in one place even if it was under these circumstances.

Here is a quick update before my little man wakes up to eat again!! At this point we are not positive that Owen does not have a Chiari. A brain MRI is not completely accurate until the baby is about 6 months old apparently. Considering all the apnea he is having, it is hard to imagine that there isn't Chiari, simply because of Abby Grace. However, I would MUCH rather it be Chiari, honestly, than all the other things they are looking for at this point.

There has been much discussion as of late, that there may be an underlying neurological developmental issue causing these problems. None of those things are good. It is not easy, as a mother to sit and listen to all of the things that are NOT normal with your baby. However I know they want to get to the bottom of this just as much as I do. The top specialist from the neurological development team will be here to meet with me on Monday. That is going to be a hard meeting, so please pray for me. It will be emotionally draining, but full of medical information as well. It is critical that I stay focused and retain everything they tell me.

Also, they are running a test for something called Congenital Central Hyperventilation Syndrome. It is NOT a good thing to have, extremely rare, and usually requires the patient to be hooked up to a ventilator while sleeping. We do not want to go there AT ALL. There is a hospital in Chicago that specializes in this syndrome and we will be sending his tests there for further evaluation. They are the top hospital in the country for this, so I feel good that they will look it over. It is a bit unnerving to me although, I know they want Owen to get the best care possible. I will also have an in-depth meeting about this on Monday.

Also, Owen needs another sleep study done before we go home, to see how much the apnea is reduced on the Prevacid and the Oxygen. There is a scheduling issue right now, but one of the doctor's is trying to make some calls and get us in. Please pray that study happens before we go home. We need to know that it is safe to take him home when that time comes. There are a few other departments and doctors that I will meet with as well on Monday but I will go into all that tomorrow. I have a room at Ronald McDonald again tonight. God has provided for us in immeasurable ways since I have been here, just like He always does. I have had rest in a bed, hot showers and hot meals. Not to mention I have seen the head doctor in a few different departments, all trying to figure out what is going on with my sweet boy.

I love you all so much. Thank you for covering us in prayer. I am so grateful, again.

Amanda

NICU Day 4

2010-06-25T10:09:00.002-05:00

Goodmorning everyone. I had a room at Ronald McDonald again last night, and I was able to sleep. Unfortunately there was a migraine waiting for me when I opened my eyes. However I will FOREVER say there is serious power in a curling iron and tube of mascara!! HA!!

Yesterday brought many meetings with different doctors on Owen's behalf. Six hours of meetings to be exact. I was mentally drained when it was over. The doctor's keep saying it is so different to meet with a mom who knows everything about her child's condition right from the start. Boy, I wish I had never done this before. However, because I know so much, I have been able to be VERY involved in his plan for treatment. They value my opions and suggestions and that is nice.

I got sleep study results yesterday, and to say I was shocked is putting it very mildly. In order for the study to pick up an apnea episode, he has to stop breathing for at least 20 seconds. So these numbers do not include any apnea that was 18 or 19 seconds. Anyhow, during the course of the night he had 109 obstructive episodes, 139 central episodes, adn 3 episodes that were a mixture of both. That is EXTREMELY severe and actually a lot more episodes than Abby Grace ever had. If you cut that down by an entire 50% it is still entirely too much apnea. My baby does not breath for half of the night, LITERALLY. I will never forget the helpless feeling I had when I learned about Abby Grace not breathing all night. I kept saying, she sleeps right next to me and I can't believe I don't know how bad it is. Here I am ALL OVER AGAIN with Owen. It is shockingly familiar.

Because of the severity, right now their number 1 concern is STOPPING the apnea immediately. We will figure out what is causing it later, we just need it to stop, and fast. We do know for sure that he has refulx, (which can cause SOME obructive episodes) so we are treating that with Prevacid. We also know that he needs help with oxygen to keep his O2 sats above 93%. So he now is on oxygen 24 hours a day. They will keep him on the Prevacid and oxygen through the weekend and see if he improves. The sleep study will be repeated next week and hopefully we will see a reduction in his episodes. We are trying to make a plan on how to address these central episodes, and I will update on that as I can.

So, we are testing for MANY issues to try and find a cause, but like I said we really just need it to settle down so his little body can rest during the night and not have to work so hard to try and breath. There is no talk of going home right now, and it will be next Wednesday at the earliest. We do know that he will go home on a moniter and oxygen that he will have to wear 24 hours a day.

We have many doctor's meeting about little Owen and advocating for him. There is pulmonary team, ENT, neurology, and genetics, as well as his 2 regular NICU doctor's who are overseeing it all. Please pray for wisdom for the doctor's and that we can find the cause for all of this madness. Pray for me this morning as it is becoming increasingly harder as all these emotions are starting to hit and I miss the other kids SO much. My heart hurts for Kayli and Ty too, they have spent TOO much time seeing their little brother and sister in a hospital and I know it is hard for them too. Abby Grace does not understand at all. When I talked to her last night she wanted to know "when were they gonna FIX her baby so he could come back home to her". It was so sweet. Thank you so much for always loving on my family and sending an encouraging word right when I need it.

Amanda

NICU Day 3

2010-06-24T10:41:00.002-05:00

Hey all, I have about 35 seconds to update, so I'm sorry for the lack of details. I was able to get a room in the Ronald McDonald house last night so I got a little sleep. HUGE PRAISE!!!

The first major udate is that there is NO Chiari!!! Thank you so much for blanketing our sweet boy in your prayers. I could never put into words how extremely heartbreaking it was to walk down that MRI hall all over again with Owen. I could not stop crying. The MRI staff knows me on a first name basis at this point, and they were all so gentle and loving. Owen also fell into a natural sleep on his own, so he didn't have to be intubated or have anesthesia. That also, is a huge praise.

He did have a sleep study last night. I haven't gotten the official report yet, however I can tell you he is having central apnea, I just don't know how much. Well, there is much more to update, but I have to go meet with the doctor's now. Please keep praying. Love you all so much.

ANA~it was so great to hear from you!!! Hope you guys are having a great summer. Talk to you soon!

Amanda

Update on Owen 2...

2010-06-23T08:46:00.002-05:00

This is David again just going to give ya'll and update on Owen. He has just come out of the MRI where praise Jesus he went to sleep so they did not have to sedate him. He was put in the 730 slot so he would be hungry, but not starving... He had to wait 4 hrs before he could have this done... Thanks for your continued prayers, and keep them coming. Manda will meet w/ Dr. Jea( Abby's Neurologist ) today to give the results of the MRI, and hopefully find out the problem... and or if he has a Chiari as did Abby Grace. I will update when I find anything else out new...

David

Updaate on Owen at Texas Children's

2010-06-22T17:14:00.002-05:00

Hello all. I am updating from the Ronald McDonald House at Texas Children's and I need to get back to Owen soon...so I will post a few details below. I have had no sleep so I will try to make the best of it. If you didn't know we were in the hospital read the previous post to catch up.

Right now Owen is showing VERY similar symptoms to Abby Grace's central apnea. He is de-satting into the mid 70s during deep sleep. They first want to learn how bad the apnea is, and then obviously rule out a chiari malformation to make sure history hasn't repeated itself.

Owen did complete the 8 hour OCRG study (designed to tell the difference between central and obstuctive apnea episodes) and we will not have results until tomorrow. However the study is not going to be as accurate because he doesn't get into that deep sleep like e does during the night.

We just finished an ECHO of his heart and will be getting results tonight probably. Dr. Jea (Abby's neurosurgeon) has already been down to NICU to see OWen so that is a huge praise. There is already an awesome team advocating for him. I am so glad we are here.

Tomorrow morning he will have an MRI of his brain that he will have to be sedated for. Because of the breathing issues he will have to be intubated as well. That is pretty invasive and I am told he might not be able to breath on his own right away so he might not be extabated for a bit.

We will also have a sleep study done asap as well to get a better reading of the episodes when he desat's so low during the night. Needless to say tomorrow is a very big day as far as tests and results are concerned so please keep us in your prayers. Love you all so much. Your prayers mean the world to us.

Needing Prayers...

2010-06-22T12:34:00.002-05:00

Hey all.... This is David trying to update all. Well Owen, our youngest, and newest has been having some breathing issues that the hospital when he was born said he would grow out of.. He hasn't and it seems to be just same as it has been. Well he has been struggling to breath in some instances here lately. Manda took him to the doctor yesterday for his eye (thought he had pink eye). His normal doctor was on vacation, so Owen had to see another. Well he had an episode as we are calling it where he struggles to breath, and his lips turn blue... It happened at the doctor so Manda went and got the doctor that he was to see and she said immediately to take him to Texas Children's. The have admitted him and yes they have been there since yesterday... He is in the NICU there due to him being so young. They did a lung and heart xray and all looked good. They actually put him on a monitor this morning to test for apnea... They are thinking that is what he has... Basically like Abby Grace. We need your prayers at this time... for our Owen, and specially Manda... I will try to update when I get more news....

P.S. Bug, T, and Abby Grace are all doing great and are enjoying thier summer...

David

Give me a tissue, Tyler turned 10!!!

2010-06-08T15:29:00.010-05:00

So my first baby boy just turned 10 and I cannot even believe it!! Where has the time gone? I remember when he was this tiny 4 year old shy litle boy who loved to be in my lap, and oh how he has changed so much!! He is still a momma's boy, and I am so thankful for that!! Ty, I hope you had an awesome day, I am so blessed and proud to be your Momma. I love you with my whole heart.

Here are the pictures from his birthday party with Nana and G-Pa. They took him to Incredible Pizza and then we went bak to their house for cake and presents.

Me & Ty

Daddy & Ty

Nana and all the kiddos. I had to practically twist their arms to be still enough for 5 seconds so I could get a picture!!

Kayli, her bestie Kayleigh, and TY. I totally forced him to get closer for a picture. He is not really into the picture thing right now, I am praying it's just a phase.

Ris and Abby Grace

Such a pretty girl (Abby Grace of course)

This was his favorite game. He kept hitting the jackpot and winning tons of tickets.

Bug in the go karts, trying her best to look as much like a teenager as possible!! Lord help me when those days are really here.

I love this child, I would keep her as my own if her momma would give her up!!!

G-Pa made the cake for Ty this year.

Singing Happy Birthday

This year Nana and GPa got Ty a PSP for his birthday and some games. He was SOOOO excited!!!!

Abby Grace is wearing a pair of seriously obnoxious tap shoes. She feels like a queen when she wears them and the grin on her face makes the tap a LITTLE more bearable, HA!

WORN OUT LITTLE GIRL!!!

You should see the way Ty looks at Owen, it is the sweetest thing ever. It just melts my heart.

Then on Sunday we went to lunch at my parents house and celebrated Ty's birthday then. My dad made hamburgers and hot dogs and it was FAB as always. For dessert he made something extra special just for Ty. He fried snickers bars and twinkies!!! The kids thought it was so cool, and Ty was so excited that PaPa had made such a fuss over his birthday. It was sweet.

We had a blast, and I only shed minimal tears over the fact that Ty is 10. I feel so blessed beyond measure. I have been given so much more than I deserve. Thank you Lord for my family.

Just For You, Uncle Brian

2010-06-07T22:06:00.007-05:00

Brian,
So I know I am a serious slacker for not posting pictures of Owen sooner, but I have been enjoying every second with ths perfect baby boy. I am so sorry you aren't here to see him just yet, but I promise to keep the letters and pictures coming. Little Owen is growing super fast and he eats like a champ. I am telling you he would nurse 24 hours a day if I would let him!! HA, he is a boob man already!! He is sleeping through the night already, so this momma cannot complain. Kayli is just in love with him and wants to hold him all the time. Ty is so excited to finally have a baby brother. I know he can't wait for him to be bigger so they can do "boy" things together. A lot of people have said Owen looks like Ty and he just glows when he hears people say that. Abby Grace is a mess like always, and she thinks Owen is HER baby and wants to know why her body won't make milk to feed Owen because it isn't fair that only Mommy gets to feed him. She was definately born to be a big sister and I am so proud of her. No jealousy whatsoever. We love you so so much and cannot wait for you to come home and have Owen in your arms!! Take care of yourself and be safe. Here are some pictures.

Just so you can get a visual of exactly how big that belly was!!! this was about 3 hours before he was born.

Auntie Ally was his first visitor after he came out of the NICU and into my room. Brian, you should have seen her, she was so excited that she cried!!!

All I have to say is that I am getting what I deserve for always messing with you about your monkey toes.......look at those toes!!!!!

Such a cute little face.

Dr. Ramos and Owen

This is what he wore when we came home from the hospital. We have way cooler hats than that, but they are all too big!!!

This is my favorite picture and I took it just for you!! He is such a cool little man already!!

Okay, that's it for now, but I will keep up I promise. I'm going to post pictures from Ty's birthday next. Love you and talk to you soon.
Amanda

Meet our Angel

2010-05-23T23:48:00.005-05:00

I am so sorry I haven't posted sooner, but things have been crazy. I am going to update quickly because my life now revolves around a breast pump and a handsome little boy who requires my undivided attention, and I couldn't be happier!!!

Owen David Haygood was born at 2:36 pm on Friday, May 21 and he weighed 9 lbs 2 oz and 20 1/2 inches long. He is a big boy!!

The c-section went without any complication and shortly after birth, Owen started showing signs of fluid in the lungs. He did cry really good, but then started to choke and gag as the nurses suctioned his lungs. Nothing too surprising considering the amount of amniotic fluid he was living in. Honestly, I expected it. Owen went to the NICU for observation and I headed to recovery with empty arms and a tear stained face.

Tonight, Owen is still in the NICU, however he is doing so awesome!! I was allowed to nurse for the first time today, and it was nothing short of amazing. Let me tell you, my baby boy likes to eat. He latched right on and was happy as could be. I am so thankful for those precious moments with him, I cannot even explain it. His breathing is still a little fast, which is the only thing they are watching right now. In order to go home, his breathing has to slow down and he has to be able to tolerate his feeds well. (Feeding is clearly NOT an issue with this kiddo!!!)

I am recovering a little slower than last time, however I have not been resting like I should. I am set to go home on Tuesday at the latest, so please pray that Owen will continue to do well and come home with us.

Thank you Lord for this beautiful and healthy baby boy. We are so thankful and honored that You picked us to be his parents.

Enjoy the pictures!!!

Soon to be a Family of 6

2010-05-20T23:37:00.002-05:00

In just 11 short hours (give or take a bit) I will be meeting the newest love of my life, Owen David Haygood. There are many things going through my mind right now as the unforgettable moment nears, but right now I think the anxiety might be winning. I am so ready to see him with my own eyes and know that he is healthy!! I am also getting a little nervous about surgery and praying that my recovery is just as smooth as it was with Abby Grace.

Will you please pray for these 3 specific things for me?
1. I can get a good night's sleep tonight.
2. No NICU time for this sweet baby.
3. Pray that I will be able to nurse soon after surgery and without complication.

I cannot wait to update with pictures of him!!! Love you all, and thank you in advance for praying.

Amanda

Only 4 days to go!!!!!

2010-05-17T22:11:00.003-05:00

Alright so I won't even pretend that I am remotely good at this blogging thing anymore. I'm so sorry to those of you who come back to check on us and there are STILL no updates. It has fallen on the bottom of the To Do list lately.

First, I want to thank all of you who prayed for Kaylanna when she had her decompression surgery. The operation was a major success, and Kaylanna's hearing has returned!!! THANK YOU JESUS!!!! I know that is not by accident and I pray that when she is older she will know how many people prayed for her and what a miracle she is.

Also, in other very big news.............Owen is set to be brought into this world this coming Friday at 1pm!!! We already know that he is a VERY big boy and I have too much amniotic fluid so my OB feels it is best to get him delivered. I am not complaining one bit!! I have been going to the office to get on the moniter every 3 days because of the fluid levels, and he has looked great the whole time. His heart rate is strong and steady, and we are so thankful. We cannot wait to meet the newest miracle in our lives.

If you think about it, say a prayer that the C-section will go smoothly with no complications and that baby Owen will completely avoid the NICU and be able to stay in the room with us. I am so looking forward to loving on him and cherishing our first days together.

We will have the computer and be blogging from the hospital. Love you all so very much.

Amanda

Last Minute Anxiety

2010-05-01T19:03:00.005-05:00

In the process of getting all the tiny clothes, socks, diapers and other baby essentials clean, and put away in their new home, I realized something big, very big. I haven't been motivated to do any of these things for a very long time. It is absolutely no exaggeration of the truth when I say that I had not done a single thing to prepare for Owen's arrival until last week. Talk about serious procrastination. But there were definite reasons for my waiting that I had not realized until now.

I was and still am afraid very much afraid that I won't actually end up with a baby. I could not imagine coming home to face all of his tiny things if for some reason I had to come home without him. I did thoroughly enjoy going through all the clothes and things, but when David got the crib out for me I wanted to throw up just looking at it. Seriously, I almost had a panic attack. Right now it is sitting in my living room about 6 feet from me as I type this, waiting for the last rail to be put back on and be moved into our bedroom where Owen will sleep. Having the crib ready is the last thing I need to do before he comes and I have not been able to bring myself to do it yet.

In my thinking, here is what occurred to me:

I will never forget the way I felt when Abby Grace stayed in the NICU for 2 weeks and I had to come home from the hospital without her. I was so young, had a normal pregnancy, and I just ASSUMED that my daughter would be born healthy, we would come home from the hospital and live happily ever after. The fact that she might have to stay in the hospital never even crossed my mind, not even once. I had a scheduled c-section, knew EXACTLY when she would be born, knew EXACTLY who would be waiting to see her in the waiting room after her birth, knew EXACTLY who would have Kayli and Ty and when they would be going on to the next family member's house. Needless to say, I did everything in my power to plan every single detail of her birth. I could not however have planned for a neonatologist to rush out of the room with her in his hands because she had fluid in her lungs preventing her from getting enough air. Traumatic for a new mommy. Anyhow, when I knew it was time for me to be discharged and she would be staying, I begged them to break my arm or do anything to me that they wanted, just please don't make me leave without her. When we drove home with an empty carseat, and I slept next to an empty crib, I remember sobbing and saying I felt like she had died. Looking at her things was almost too much to bear at the time. I know it probably sounds crazy to some of you but that is how I felt in my very hormonal state.

Sooner than we had planned we found out we were pregnant again and couldn't have been happier. I won't lie, we had the initial worry over things that don't matter when you are expecting another baby like: we will have 2 kids in diapers, how will we afford to feed everyone, we don't have enough space.............you know, the norm. I also had extreme guilt over the fact that Abby Grace was still a baby and I wasn't ready for her to have to share her mommy at such a young age. I felt like I was robbing her of being a baby or something. Then I felt guilty about feeling guilty. It was a vicious cycle. I started to bleed and have complications very early in the pregnancy, but then things were looking okay and we assumed we were in the clear. A few weeks later Abby Grace and I went out of town to visit my sister in Austin. Austin has the best Goodwill stores ever so I bought my maternity wardrobe and was super excited about all the new clothes I would get to wear as my belly grew. The next day I was due to head home, and I had started to bleed a little and have some pretty intense cramps. My OB sent me to the hospital where an ultra sound confirmed we had lost our baby. I could not have been more devastated and actually the next few days are pretty much a blur and I am thankful for that.

After all of it, I couldn't stand to even look at my maternity clothes, so I packed them up right away and gave them to my sister in law, who was pregnant with my niece Madelyne. Getting rid of my maternity clothes was like a protection for me, so I didn't have to look at them laying around the house. I shut that door of my life and didn't want it to be opened again. I became bitter and seriously depressed. I never imagined losing a baby that I never held or touched could put me in such a dark and foggy place for so long. It has taken over 2 years for me to come to a sense of real healing about losing our baby, and some days still are not easy. My sister in law delivered Madelyne Grace on the exact same date that I would have been delivering our 4th child. I was in the room when she was born and saw her take her first breath. It was an unbelievable miracle that I will never forget or take for granted. I love to watch her grow and being around her gives me more joy than I know what to do with. It doesn't make me sad or bitter, but it took time to get to that place.

So now that we are days away from meeting our precious Owen, I am starting to fully realize the effects of these different life changing events have had on me. I am scared to death to lose this baby, even though he is fully formed in my womb and has been completely healthy. I am scared to death to have to come home and face his things if he isn't going to be with me. In my mind I think I could not recover from such a thing again. I have been filled with a fear and anxiety that I cannot explain but is VERY real. I am tired of him being in my belly, and feel I cannot rest until he is safe and healthy in my arms. My mind goes to terrible places when I dwell on it for too long. I am really trying to cherish Owen's every hiccup and every kick and not wish this pregnancy away. I have so much to be thankful for and I have needed that reminder over the past couple of days.

Would you all say a little prayer that things will mentally settle for me soon? Thank you for allowing me to be so open and vulnerable on this blog. It truly is therapy for me to express how I feel on days like today. Thank you friends.
Amanda

Please Pray Over Kaylanna

2010-04-27T22:25:00.005-05:00

Just want to give a quick update before my prayer request......

I have a Dr's appt tomorrow morning and it would not hurt my feelings one bit if you want to pray that I have started to dilate so we can just head over to the hospital and meet our precious Owen!!!! I am SOOOOOOO ready!

I had both of my baby showers this weekend and they were beyond perfect. I will share pictures as soon as I have them. I have the best friends and family a girl could ask for. I can't wait to show you all of the goodies that were given to us. We are blessed! But for now, there are other things to be taken care of, like getting my house in order for another person to join the family!!! AHHH the stress!

Anyway, on to the most important part of this post. Please pray for Kaylanna. She is having Chiari decompression surgery very soon (the exact same surgery that Abby Grace had last July).

Isn't this sweet girl so beautiful????

Please take a minute and pray over precious Kaylanna. (Isn't that a gorgeous name?) Anyhow, her mom and I have been emailing back and forth for probably a month or so now, and her 5 year old daughter, Kaylanna is having Chiari decompression surgery this Monday. Kaylanna suddenly lost hearing in one of her ears, which prompted the MRI, then the discovery of the Chiari. From what I understand, she isn't guaranteed that her hearing will return, but they are hoping it will when they restore the cerebral fluid flow after the surgery.

Please pray over her neurosurgeon, that his hands will be guided by the Ultimate Physican as he operates on Kaylanna. Pray that her hearing is fully restored, and that her recovery will be quick, and with as little pain as possible. Pray for her sweet momma, Kayla, that she will be able to rest and have the strength to care for Kaylanna like she will need to.

Any encouraging words or prayers you might want to send to Kayla would be greatly appreciated. Her email address is kay10704@aol.com

I will never forget reading all of the emails on Abby Grace's surgery day. When I thought I couldn't go on one more second, I would go back and read them again. Won't you encourage Kayla the same way you encouraged me? Thank you all so much for praying for my new friend and her sweet baby.

Love,
Amanda

A Visit to Texas Children's

2010-04-12T22:57:00.003-05:00

Yes that is what you just read!!!! I swear the valet staff probably recognizes me when I pull up (and thinks, man she should clean out her car HA!!!). Anyhow, here is a quick run-down of our Friday afternoon.....

So I was taking a shower and Abby Grace was in the bathroom talking to me through the curtain. She was sitting on the toilet lid trying to file her toenails (yes, this accident was ALL in the name of beauty!!!). Anyhow, I had turned the water off and went to open the curtain, and she fell backwards off the toilet and slams the back of her head on the edge of the bathtub. She never lost consciousness, but she started to vomit all over me as soon as I picked her up (so much for the shower). Anyhow, I finally get a look at her head and she has a huge goose egg right on her insicion scar. NOT GOOD. She had hit RIGHT exactly where her vertebrae had been removed. She proceeds to vomit for a good bit but is still responding to my voice and commands (squeezing my fingers, touching her nose, etc..). After she finished getting sick she was super sleepy (I was not overly concerned about that because it probably wore her out to be so sick and cry so hard).

I called Dr. Jea's office just to let him know what had happened and they told me to bring her in right away. NOT WHAT I WANTED TO HEAR. So I make arrangements for Kayli and Ty to be picked up (Thanks Auntie Kate) and head off to TCH. We proceed to wait HOURS and HOURS for a CT scan and to be seen by a doctor. Long story short, her CT scan was negative for any bleeds or damage to her surgery site, but it did show she had suffered a head trauma. It also showed that her surgery site has begun to show some of the permanent healing is taking place, and we are so thankful for that bit of good news!!!! At the end of the whole 9 hour adventure, they said she had a moderate concussion from blunt force trauma to the head. I felt like a CSI episode, seriously!!!!

Things worked out for good in the end. Thank you Jesus that she didn't do any real damage to her brain during her fall. As her momma, it was scary to think that I can't prevent her from having these falls. She can't live in a bubble and all toddlers have accidents and bruises. I hate that every time it has the potential to be something so serious. On the flip side of that, I have so much to be thankful for and I shouldn't complain. Thank you Lord for watching over Abby Grace all the time, even when I cannot.

Amanda

"I HEART" Thursday

2010-04-08T11:32:00.001-05:00

Here are a few of the things "I HEART" this week:

"I HEART" that Abby Grace has become such a Daddy's girl lately. It is so sweet and he is wrapped all around her finger about ten times, maybe twelve.
"I HEART" Kayli is all finished with her TAKS test for the week and feels like she did great.
"I HEART" that we had a break from baseball games this week due to TAKS testing.
"I HEART" that I have family coming in town this weekend for my Mammaw's 80th birthday party.
"I HEART" that David has been giving Abby Grace a bath every night this week (and I didn't even ask) because it is hard for me to lean over the bath tub now.
"I HEART" that I have almost finished planning the 5 Grade Graduation Party.
"I HEART" that my mom and I got Owen's crib bedding last weekend. It is oh so precious!
"I HEART" that Owen is almost done cooking and will be in my arms before you know it!!!

Love,
Amanda

Baby Owen Update

2010-04-07T12:56:00.003-05:00

Thought I would give a quick update on the pregnancy and how things have been going as of late. Sorry the picture quality isn't great, but it will do. I haven't had any maternity pictures taken, but I am really hoping to do so here soon. We are not planning to have any more, so I want to remember this belly!!

Anyhow, my last appointment was pretty good. My blood pressure has been a little high (not too bad) but it is enough to cause headaches and slight vision change. Also I have become pretty anemic over the last couple of months, which explains why I have been SOOOO tired. I am taking a pretty high dose of Iron now, which is helping.

I went to the doctor a week ago today and by my original due date I should have been exactly 30 weeks. However, I have really felt the entire pregnancy that I was a few weeks farther along than my due date. So we schedule my c-section for May 28 and then head down for an ultra sound to take a peek at the little man. So we get started and my Dr. is measuring Owen's head and belly and feet.......by measuring the baby, he was 34 weeks and 5 days!!!! He is already 4.5 lbs!!! I could have had a heart attack. So needless to say I now have no idea how far along I am..... By my due date, I should be 31 weeks today, but by ultra sound I am 35 weeks and 5 days today. Isn't that the biggest difference? It is very stressful actually, but honestly I KNOW i am farther than 31 weeks. So I will go back next week and probably do another ultra sound. We will be making adjustments to the delivery date I would assume!! Please pray we can pin down a more accurate date and I can have some peace of mind. I have felt VERY overwhelmed lately with not knowing when he will be here.

Here is Abby Grace kissing her little brother. She is SO excited for him to be here and can't wait to meet him. Kayli and Ty are beyond thrilled as well, but they kind of know what to expect. I am excited to see how Abby Grace will do in her new role as a big sister and a little nervous at the same time. I know Kayli will be a good teacher for her. And Ty is super pumped at the thought of another baseball player in the house!!

Thank you all for praying with us over Little Owen. We are so thankful for a healthy pregnancy and cannot wait to have him in our arms!!

Amanda
Amanda

Easter 2010

2010-04-06T22:34:00.008-05:00

So these pictures are backwards from the way I wanted them but I am not changing it now. At this point, I should be thankful they are making it to the computer in the first place!! HA!

Anyhow, we had a great day on Easter. We got up and went to church (only a few minutes late)and heard an awesome sermon. Then we had lunch at my parent's house, actually I think I should call it a feast rather than lunch. We headed to David's mom for a quick hello and photo shoot and then finished off the evening at David's Dad's house. The kiddos always have a Easter egg hunt there every year and this year was no exception. There is money hidden in some eggs, candy in others......but a big prize for whoever finds the "prize egg". I know Abby Grace got the $5 egg and I think Marissa got the $10 egg. Needless to say, the day was fantastic spent with the entire family and we were all worn out by bedtime, or maybe I was the only one!!

I was attempting to get a group picture here. They were NOT cooperating!

She was SO excited when she got her basket.

Here they are coming out the back door trying to see all the eggs they can before they are allowed to run off and start grabbing.

Is she not absolutely STUNNING??

She felt beautiful in her new dress and flower for her hair. One of my best friends made the flowers for both girls hair and the one on Abby Grace's dress. I will be hosting a giveaway soon! Details to come!!!

Yes he might be the most gorgeous boy on the face of the Earth...until little Owen gets here, and then he has to share that title!! :)

She was being such a little stinker at this point in the day. Let's just say there was no nap and she was not in the mood to pose.

I love this picture............she looks SO sweet and innocent.

My big brother Trey, me, and my sister Kim. You can see how big the belly is getting now. I LOVE IT!!!

This is exactly where all the kids can be found at Grannie's house if PaPa Jim is home.....ALL AROUND HIS CHAIR!!! He is such a good PaPa. They are lucky to have him.

All the kids with my Mammaw and Pappaw.

This might have been our only family picture of the day.

Abby Grace and Madelyne Grace in their matching dresses. You should have seen all the work it took just to get this one picture!! Thank you Grannie for picking such beautiful dresses for the littlest girls!

I hope you all had an awesome Easter with your families. I know ours was fantastic, we have so much to be thankful for.

Love,
Amanda

Let the Baseball Season Begin!!

2010-04-06T20:30:00.007-05:00

So the chaos that becomes our life during spring ball has begun!!! We love every second of it, more so when I am not 8 months pregnant!!! Anyhow, Ty is playing for the Nationals this season and the team has some real talent. The boys are doing great, and it is so much fun to watch them. They have really changed since their t-ball days when they were 5!!!

The grandparents are all sick of the long hair..........but this momma loves it!!! It looks so good on him.

Up to bat............

Sooooo serious............

Here is Daddy keeping the books and trying his best to look busy!! Just kidding babe.

And this is Miss Priss being her normal girly self at the ballpark.

This little beauty is my niece Madelyne Grace. Isn't she so pretty?

She is becoming quite the priss pot herself!! We wouldn't have it any other way for our girls.

So that is the start of the baseball pictures. Many more to come I'm sure. Yes Kayli is still playing select softball, and I desperately need to get some new pictures of her with her team. They usually play out of town and I have been staying home for the majority of her tournaments lately. They are playing in town in a couple of weeks and I am so excited to see them play soon. I know it will be a lot harder to be at the ball field once Little Owen gets here!!

I am posting multiple times tonight, so be sure and check the posts before.

~Amanda

Happy 11 Birthday Kayli Bug!!

2010-04-06T18:10:00.008-05:00

So I am going to attempt to catch up the blog tonight. We have been running around like crazy lately and I just haven't had the energy to keep this updated. I will post multiple times tonight so be sure to check back.

Last week my baby girl turned 11!!! I cannot even believe I am typing those words, seriously. She is everything I could have ever imagined in a daughter and I cannot imagine a single second of my life without her. I can only pray that Abby Grace grows up to be just as sweet and caring as Kayli. She is such a hard worker, the best helper in the house, and always willing to go the extra mile to help when she knows her Momma is tired.

Kayli Bug,
I love you with everything inside me and I can hardly believe you are 11!! I am so thankful God picked me to be your momma. Your personality shines through your big brown eyes every time you smile. I love the way you are changing as you have gotten older and starting to grow up a bit. You have the sweetest spirit and always strive to do the right thing. I pray that our relationship only gets better and better as you become a teenager. I love you baby girl.
Love,
Momma

Nana and GPa took her to Incredible Pizza for her party and everyone had a blast!!! I think the go-karts were everyone's favorite. Even Abby Grace took a turn (with Auntie Kate driving of course). Here are some pictures from the night.

As you can see, we all had a blast. Even the big kids (THE ADULTS) had their fair share of playing time!! We also had celebrations at Grandma's house and Grannie's house, but I totally forgot my camera. My children are so blessed to have all of their grandparents living and healthy, and within 5 miles of home.
Love,
Amanda

Spring Break Pictures

2010-03-26T15:13:00.009-05:00

So I know I am a serious slacker, but everyone in my house (except David) has had bronchitis this week. Let's just say it has been nothing short of MISERABLE around here. Kayli and Ty finally went back to school today. Talk about an extended spring break...... Believe me, they were NOT enjoying themselves AT ALL!!

Anyhow, for a few days during spring break, the kids and I went to the resort in Conroe with Nana and Auntie Kate. IT WAS A TOTAL BLAST!!! We had so much fun together and I am so glad they invited us to go. The weather was gorgeous, and we made great memories. Our time was filled with swimming (indoor pool), mini golf, archery, feeding the horses, staying up WAY too late, eating WAY too much junk food, playing at the playground, and feeding the ducks. Needless to say, we didn't want to come home. Here are some pictures from the trip.

Hope everyone at your house is healthy and you all enjoyed your spring break. I know we did!!!

A Love Between Brothers

2010-03-22T19:07:00.003-05:00

***I actually wrote this post on Monday of this week. Not sure why I never posted it.***

Growing up I had an older sister and an older brother. I am all too familiar with the world of being and having a sister. It is just as normal to me as existing, and being a sister is one of my favorite things in life.

However my brother never had a brother, so that bond was pretty foreign to me. It never occured to me until these last few days actually. But I assure you, it is just as strong as the love between sisters but very different at the same time.

David's brother, Brian left today for his deployment and saying goodbye last night was nothing short of heartbreaking. The tears flow freely just replaying it in my head again. Brian is so many things to our family. He is a brother, an uncle, a son, a fiance and him being away for an entire year is difficult to swallow. When I was hugging him goodbye (completely sobbing) and he was talking to by belly it completely broke my heart that he would miss the miracle of Owen's birth. (He was not there when Abby Grace was born either because he was on his first tour in Iraq.) But I think the most gut wrenching part for me was watching my husband hug his little brother and say their goodbyes. Each of them trying to hold back tears and be strong for the other. They share a bond that I cannot explain, but it is one of the strongest and most unique that I have ever known. I am so grateful to be a part of it. I pray that Ty and Owen share the same relationship when they are older.

I know with my entire being that I serve a God who is much bigger than my heartache, and He holds Brian's life in His very hands every second of every day, whether here or in a foreign land. Will you please keep pur family in your prayers right now?

"I HEART" Thursday

2010-03-18T10:20:00.011-05:00

This week I am participating in "I HEART" Thursday again. Click on the button to head over to Crystal's page and see what everyone else "hearts" this week. Thank you Crystal for reminding me to be thankful.

I am participating in this weeks I "heart"... at You and Me Plus Three. Go there now to add yours and read others!!
Here are a few things "I HEART" this week:

"I HEART" that it is spring break right now. The kids have had a great week off from school and we have enjoyed the time together.
"I HEART" all of our supportive family that lives so close to us. My kiddos see their grandparents ALL the time, and I am so thankful for that. I did not have that luxury as a child.
"I HEART" that David was able to go with me to the doctor yesterday. I always feel so much better when he is by my side.
"I HEART" that my little Owen will be here in 8-10 weeks. I cannot believe the pregnancy is almost over and I am counting down the days to hold him in my arms.
"I HEART" that my BIL, Brian is coming in to town today and we are all having dinner together for his birthday. Happy Birthday Uncle Brian, we HEART you!!!
"I HEART" that I have connected with so many other families that have been affected by Chiari Malformation through my blog.
"I HEART" that I have a miracle story to tell them about my precious Abby Grace.
"I HEART" my real true friends. The list may be short, but I know they love me for who I am, even if I am still wearing yesterday's mascara!!!
"I HEART" laying back on the couch and watching my belly jump up and down from the little miracle that is growing inside of me.
"I HEART" that David took me to see Casting Crowns last week. They are our favorite music group and it was our 3rd time to see them.
"I HEART" this video of Abby Grace. I know some of you have already seen it, but it is Abby Grace's very first steps after her brain surgery. This was taken a short 48 hours after her operation and fully shows the miracle that was (and still is) before us. I stumbled across it last week and it brought back SO MANY emotions. Anyhow, hope you "HEART" it just as much as I do. (Please ignore my ridiculous sounding voice in the background.)

Jonas Brothers

2010-03-17T20:07:00.013-05:00

Kayli's best friend, Kayleigh invited her to go see Jonas Brothers with her and we had a blast. Kayleigh's mom, Shelley is a very good friend of mine, so the day was better than a bunch of SCREAMING girls, at least we had each other to talk to!! Let me just say that I have never experienced such noise and mahem, but it was a great time. Thank you Shelley and Kayleigh for thinking of us!!!!

Don't they look so cute? Bug went to the Jonas show with Kayleigh last year, so they wore their shirts that they got.

Here they are after we got in our seats. They were practically jumping up and down excited!!! It was oh so precious.

These are the signs the little girls in front of us were holding up. They were about 6 or 7 I would guess. They were so proud of their hard work. I thought it was pretty precious.

We had SOOOO much fun at the rodeo. The Jonas Brothers actually weren't half bad. They really can sing, so it wasn't complete torture by any means. Thanks again, it was a blast!!!
Amanda

Let's Play Catch Up........

2010-03-17T19:15:00.014-05:00

So I am not even going to pretend that I am not the world's WORST blogger ever. Anyhow, here is a litte update on how things have been going at our house and what we have been up to.....

Nana and G Pa took us to the livestock show at it was a blast. Abby Grace has never been and the girls just got new boots (Thanks Auntie Kate!!!!) so it was perfect to take them.

Don't they look so cute? The sun was in Tyler's eyes and frankly he was not in the mood for pictures at all. Such a boy.

Nana and her Kayli Bug. Goodness she looks older every time I look at her (Kayli of course!!). HA!

G-Pa and Abby Grace walking in. Actually I don't think she did any walking the entire day whatsoever. David won't let me carry her (and it is STRICTLY enforced) so Nana and GPa got a workout for the day!! We seriously needed a stroller.

A momma with her baby. When I told AG it was a baby she said......"Are you sure that is a baby? She is soooooo big. I hope Owen is smaller than that." LOL me too baby, me too........

Can you tell she was totally not sure of being so close to such big creatures? She didn't want to walk down up and down where the cows were, because she didn't want to get the bottom of her new pink boots dirty. Isn't that cute?

Okay, so I was totally annoyed at this picture. We are walking by and the indian man asks if we would like to take a picture with him all dressed up. So, of course we say yes and everyone gets close for a picture. After I take it, he tells my father in law that he works for tips and any donation for the picture would be fine. Ummmm okay, first of all, I didn't need the picture that bad and certainly thought is was rude for indian man to EXPECT us to pay him for a smile, and now that I look again he isn't smiling at all. Very irritating, maybe it's just me though.

I am just going to tell you now that these smiles are totally fake and my kids would not survive on a farm for 35 seconds!!! I totally threatened them that they had better smile!!! All 3 kids were scared to death of the animals and more than ready to get out of there.

As you can see, GPa was NOT scared AT ALL!!!! LOL

Aunt Misty and Marissa came too!! They had tickets for the rodeo that day so we just saw them for a little bit.

Isn't this a cute picture? I loved it!!

The day was a blast and we were all pretty worn out after all the walking we did. Maybe I was the only one who was tired!!! I will be posting more later on tonight, so be sure to check back!!!

Amanda

Chiari Malformation Journey- Praying For Abby Grace

2010-02-19T08:50:00.007-06:00

I loved participating in "I Heart" yesterday!! It was a great way to connect with other bloggers and I am tired of being a silent reader. There are so many blogs I read, but rarely comment and interact with the writer, so that is about to change!!!

Today I am doing the "Show Us Your Life" blog hop started by Kelly @ www.kellyskornerblog.com about certain ministries we may have or journeys we have already traveled that might help someone else going through the same thing. When we first started this road with Abby Grace, Kelly posted about our story and asked her readers to pray over our little princess. So many people came to our blog that way and prayed with us on the day of Abby Grace's surgery and the days that followed. Kelly will never know how much that meant to me as a mom to connect with other mom's who have been down the same road I was on. What was neat about it all, is that I have been reading Kelly's blog since right after Harper was born and she was fighting for her life in the NICU. I didn't have a blog at the time, but have been following Harper's story for over a year now. Okay, that might have been the longest intro EVER........sorry.

Our two year old daughter, Abby Grace was diagnosed with a severe case of Chiari Malformation in June of 2009. I knew there was a problem in January of 2009 when I went through my room one night to find her completely blue and not breathing (she was sleeping). I semi panicked, and took her to the ER. They were insistent that it was just because she had a snotty nose and it was harder for her to get air in. I knew that wasn't right, but took her home anyway. While at the ER, I learned that her tubes had come out of her ears and she had an infection. I scheduled the appt with the pediatrician for a couple days later and scheduled her surgery for tube replacement (we had horrible trouble with her ears, so I wanted the tubes replaced asap). I told her pedi about the breathing incident and that she stops breathing in her sleep every night multiple times and he almost thought I was crazy for mentioning that a 2 year old could have sleep apnea. I knew it was apnea all along, but assumed that was ALL it was. Boy was I wrong......

2 weeks later when she had her tubes put in her ears, the anesthesiologist came out and said she had stopped breathing on the table during the very MINOR surgery and that there was definitely a breathing issue that needed to be checked into asap. I did not know at the time, but he made a call to someone he knew at Texas Children's to get Abby Grace in for a sleep study. One day I got a call on my cell phone saying there was a cancellation for a sleep study and could we come that night. I of course dropped everything and headed to pack a hospital bag, all the while not knowing how we had even been put on the waiting list. God was already working out every single detail for a miraculous ending!!!

Fast Forward a few weeks......AG's neurologist (you automatically get one after a sleep study) called and asked me to come in for the results of her sleep study. Turns out, she had an extreme case of central apnea and stopped breathing every 10-12 minutes all night long for up to 30 seconds at a time......WOW. David didn't go to this appointment with me, because I honestly didn't realize what a big deal it would turn out to be. She tells me that since her apnea is all coming from her brain she needs to do an MRI just to RULE ANYTHING OUT, "strictly routine procedure"........ she said she would be very surprised to find anything on her brain since she was so developmentally ahead and so very smart. The knot in my stomach made me absolutely know right down to my toes, that there was so much more to this than I could have ever imagined.

Her first MRI of the brain was in June and the results were very clear that there was indeed something on her brain, called a Chiari Malformation. It was extremely large compared to other Chiari cases and she would need an MRI of her spine to see if the Chiari had caused any permanent damage to her spinal cord. Remember all this time that she is still having the apnea all night long, so Momma is getting no sleep at all. Her spinal MRI showed no permanent damage, however we were then told we needed to see Dr. Andrew Jea, a neurosurgeon as soon as possible. By the end of the day, his office had called and scheduled out appointment for 3 days later. They apologized they couldn't see us sooner but he was out of town and was coming back that day to meet with us. Everything inside of me knew that this was about to get out of control and I couldn't believe I was even saying the word neurosurgeon out loud about my baby girl.

We saw Dr. Jea that Thursday, and hand in hand with my husband, in exam room 2, we were told that her case was so severe and she would require brain surgery as soon as possible in order to protect her from permanent damage that very well could happen at any time. Their initial hope was that the surgery would improve the apnea, but there were no guarantees. We were told that she could have a stroke or be paralyzed within a year if we do not address this issue right away. Without delay, I pulled out my calendar to schedule this surgery with tears flowing down my face. After all, I was not exactly scheduling a birthday party, or baseball practice, this was my baby's life here......brain surgery. The big day was on the calendar.......July 27, 2009. Dr. Jea was so sweet, I know he could see how scared I was. He was very reassuring and I knew instantly that I wanted him to be the one to do her surgery. I was comfortable with him right away and if there was one thing I had total peace over, it was Dr. Jea doing this operation.

We took family vacation the week before her surgery so we could all be together as much as possible before the big day. My entire family was there and it was wonderful, until I got bit by a copperhead snake!!! Oh what a sense of humor our God has!! I can laugh about it now, but honestly in the moments that followed, I thought I was going to die and my baby was having brain surgery in 7 days!!! I was seriously hysterical. I know that the hospital staff probably wanted to give me as much morphine as possible so I would shut up!! Seriously though, it was the worst pain I have ever been in EVER. After 2 days of vacation in the hospital, I was sent home with a seriously, disgustingly swollen and purple foot, on crutches, and strict instruction to stay off it for at least a month!! It's hard enough to walk on crutches anyway, much less with all the medication I had to take.

Monday morning we had to be at the hospital at 4:30 am for 6:30 am surgery start time. Honestly I was so stressed there is a lot of that morning and day that I don't even remember. I know our entire families were there with us. I think there were 6 cars one behind the other just on the way to the hospital. Abby Grace went into the operating room in a pink little tykes car and it was so precious!! Some of our best friends came up to be with us, Rachel and Victor. The kiddos in their Sunday school class had all made cards for Abby Grace and they brought them for me to read. It was one of my favorite surprises of the day and I will cherish them forever. We received multiple calls through the operation to let us know how things were going.

The removed her top vertebrae all together and after doing that they realized that her cerebral fluid was still 100% blocked because her Chiari was so large. They had to open up her dura and create a patch to allow her fluid to flow freely around her brain. An hour or so later Dr. Jea came out and I must have ran to him to find out the news. Surgery was over, and was deemed a success. He said the next few days would be difficult and we could expect lots of vomiting and nausea, which is very common when the dura is opened up. It makes you lose your equilibrium and takes time to gain it back. We would be able to see her within an hour or so. Nothing could have prepared me for what I was going to see in the recovery room......

Since this post is about 10 days long, I am going to do a part 2 in a day or so. Thank you if you are still reading!! Stay tuned for the last half of the story. Thank you Kelly for having this great platform where us momma's can share things we have gone through. I found another Chiari mom already just from your post today. What a small world. Thank you!!!

Amanda

"I Heart"

2010-02-18T10:22:00.002-06:00

Okay, so it is not any news around here how much we LOVE Bentley @ www.youandmeplusthree.com so this week I am going to participate in "I Heart" Thursdays. It has been a challenging week for me as a mom, so I need a reminder of all the things I am grateful for. This was inspired by Bentley's heart journey, and I think it is a fabulous idea!! So here we go:

"I Heart" feeling little Owen kicking around in my belly. (I don't think I have told you his name yet.....Owen David!! Do you love it?)

"I Heart" how much my husband loves me. He LOVES my pregnant belly and is quick to reassure when I have a "woman" moment about weight gain.

"I Heart" that Abby Grace has been given a clean bill of health and there seem to be no complications from her Chiari.

"I Heart"that baseball has started for Ty again this week. He loves the sport so much, and I think he gets bored when Kayli is playing year round and he isn't.

"I Heart" that Kayli is so loving and nurturing. I was so much like her at that age and is blesses my heart to see her want to take care of everyone.

"I Heart" being a stay at home mom. Abby Grace has said so many times that she is happy I am home with her all day and not having to leave her for work. Yes, it is a challenge, but I still am grateful.

"I Heart" being a momma. I love that Ty always comes back for one more kiss when leaving to go somewhere without me. I love that Kayli needs to hear from me that she has picked a perfect outfit for the day and how fabulous her hair looks. And I love that Abby Grace just needs my attention and love. Can't wait to see what precious Owen will need from his momma.

"I Heart" pickles in a very dangerous, pregnant way!!

"I Heart" putting on warm socks from the dryer when it is cold outside.

"I Heart" dates with my husband. I love getting dressed up for him and us being together for a little while away from the craziness of home and schedules!!!

"I Heart" my leopard print high heels that my sister bought for me. Seriously, I always feel fabulous in those shoes.

"I Heart" teeny tiny babies. Cannot get enough of them and I would always have one forever, if of course we had the space and money to feed them all!! LOL

Okay that is all for now. I will be posting "I Heart" again next Thursday!!

Abby Grace has an appointment to see her neurosurgeon, Dr. Jea this afternoon. Please pray everything goes smoothly and we get the release we are hoping for. Love you friends!!

Amanda

Look Who Came to Visit!!!

2010-01-31T18:06:00.002-06:00

So we got a surprise visit this weekend from Uncle Brian!! He is still doing his training before being deployed again, so he was able to come home before being sent oversees. We were so thankful to be able to have a bit more time with him before he will be gone for so long. All of us had lunch together yesterday and some of us went to the movies. Great day with family.

You are looking at one happy Momma!!! (Notice Miss Priss around his leg down there.....HA!)

She likes him just a bit, can't you tell???

Not only could I not imagine having my son oversees, I surely could not imagine my fiance or husband being there!! Pray for Ally as she is without Brian, for comfort and peace.

Hope you all had a great weekend. I know we did!!!

Amanda

New "Pretending" Phase

2010-01-28T09:02:00.005-06:00

Okay, so I am sure this is totally normal for a 3 year old, but Abby Grace is "pretending" everything right now. It is so cute and I absolutely am LOVING it.

She pretends a lot that her name is Chloye, and during those times she will not, absolutely not respond to the name Abby Grace. She says, "My name is Chloye, I do not know Abby Grace" So we all just go along with her, and call her Chloye until she moves on to the next thing......

But the past couple of days, she now pretends that she is pregnant like Momma. I think it is precious, but David refuses to play along, he says it is weird. It's hilarious!! She says, "Feel Momma, feel. My baby girl is moving in my belly!" So then I put my hand on her belly and she makes it move up and down like the baby is kicking. She gets so excited!! I think it is priceless. However, I am interested to see what she starts pretending when I am nursing a newborn. HA!!!

Amanda

Release from Neurologist

2010-01-24T23:18:00.004-06:00

I know I briefly mentioned the other day about Abby Grace's appointment, but I thought I would share the details......

We saw her neurologist at Texas Children's last week to get the results from her last sleep study. (Remember, originally these results were going to play a huge part in whether she was going to need another brain surgery.) Her sleep study was almost as if it wasn't done on the same child, it was so good!! Is that not awesome?!?! The amount of central apnea she is having has been reduced by over 65% and the lowest her oxygen went was 89% (which was only 2 times)!! I hope you can all see how significant that is.........your prayers over our angel are still being heard to this day!!! Dr. H said that if AG was a brand new patient with absolutely no neuro history, she would not even mention the little bit of apnea she did have because it is so close to being within the normal range. I was so thrilled at the word NORMAL describing a test result for her!!!

So right now the plan is we are going to take her off the oxygen at night (THANK YOU LORD) for 2 weeks and see if she seems more lethargic during the day. So far things have been fine. If there is no significant change, the oxygen tanks can go back to the medical company for good!!! Dr. H is completely comfortable with AG going an entire year without another sleep study, unless of course there is some significant change, or seizures become a problem. She also will not have to see Dr. H again in her office until 2011. When I walked out of the appointment with her, I could honestly feel a huge weight had been lifted off my chest. I just cried when I got in the car. I am so grateful she is here with us and doing so great. I never want to forget what a miracle she is.

Here she is checking herself out in the mirror after she is all "hooked up" and ready for bed. Do you all remember her "Bentley" that she got after her brain surgery? Bentley's momma, Crystal at youandmeplusthree.com left this little bear (which we have recently discovered is actually a cat) for AG and we wanted to name her Bentley, for obvious reasons. Anyhow, she is still VERY MUCH a part of the family and goes everywhere with her. Such a special gift.

Look at every single one of those wires that is connected to a lead all over her little body. It made me so sad the first time we did this.

The control center for all the leads.

She was getting so tired at this point. But she was such a big girl and never cried one time, until they put the cannula in her nose. Poor princess was SO tired. I painted her finger nails and toenails for her while she was getting connected, it is such a great distraction. I have done this for her since the first study, and now when we are going for one she remembers to put the polish in the bag. So cute.

This is from when we were in the hospital after she had her seizures. We are praying to not have any pictures from a hospital until we are having this baby!!!!!

Thank you all friends from the bottom of my heart for staying on this journey with us since last June. It has been rocky and scary; filled with heartache, fear, miracles, and complete joy all at the same time. I finally feel like there is an end in sight to all of this. My baby girl definitely has a story to tell, and when she is old enough to understand, I will tell her how many people prayed for a miracle and that is exactly what she is. I love you all so much, and all of your emails and comments have carried me through more days than I could ever express.

Amanda

Scattered and Chaotic

2010-01-22T14:15:00.003-06:00

So since I am the biggest blog slacker EVER, I am warning you now......this post is WAY scattered, much like my pregnant brain right now so apparently it is fitting. :)

Let's play catch up over the past week, shall we?

1. Abby Grace had a sleep study, and we spent the night at the hospital AGAIN. (Got out Friday morning)
2. I was admitted to Women's Hospital (Friday night) after some pretty significant bleeding and cramping. HUGE scare considering that is exactly how our miscarriage started last time. I was seriously hysterical, you can ask my mom. Anyhow, our sweet boy looks perfect on ultra sound and is still kicking around everywhere. I have a small tear in my placenta that has kept me on the couch for an entire week. No worries though, the baby looks perfect.
3. ***HUGE PRAISE*** A very dear friend of mine, Rachel (who actually started this blog for me) her new baby Parker was critically ill at Texas Children's the entire time I was there with Abby (hence the reason I didn't tell you about it sooner) was able to come home!!! He was so very sick and God watched over his every tiny breath, and he is so much better now. Visit Rachel at www.jackandcoledesings.blogspot.com
4. Uncle Brian left for his deployment on Sunday. Couldn't go to the airport because of bedrest. Very very sad.
5. ***HUGE PRAISE**** I will post separately about this soon. Got results from Abby Grace's sleep study and it was the best one EVER!!! Completely different from all her previous studies and she no longer has to sleep on oxygen, and her neurologist has released her for, are you ready, AN ENTIRE YEAR!!!!!! Unless something comes up, of course. I was so relieved at her results and could feel a huge weight taken off my shoulders that I didn't even realize was there.
6. Currently planning a HUGE graduation party for Kayli's entire 5 grade. Love these big stressful projects, not sure why. Cannot believe my baby is going to junior high.
7. Took Kayli for an X Ray of her foot this morning. Pediatrician thinks she might have heel spurs, OUCH!
8. Ty has baseball tryouts tomorrow. The craziness of spring ball always comes around too quickly!!

I think that is about it for catch up now. Sorry this is such a random post but that is so fitting for life right now, scattered and chaotic!!!

Oh and yes, the baby boy in my belly is absolutely addicted to chocolate!! I am not a huge chocolate eater myself, so this is totally new for me. I will not even publicly admit how much chocolate milk I drink in one day!!! Hope everyone has a great weekend!!

Amanda

Let Me Introduce...........

2010-01-13T22:04:00.007-06:00

Is this the most beautiful thing you have seen all day or what?

Look at the little hand by the face!!

Oh my, I cannot wait to kiss those tiny fingers!!

And don't even get me started on these PERFECT little feet!!!

One more profile shot, just because a proud Momma can do that!!!!

We learned at the appointment today that everything with our tiny angel looks perfect so far. Kidneys are already functioning as they should, 4 chamber heart is beating strong, stomach and bladder look great, and the brain and spine also look glorious.

Oh yes.............and IT'S A BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can you even believe it? There is a baby boy moving all around in my belly right now and I couldn't be happier. We are so blessed and grateful for the awesome outcome of our appointment!! Uncle Brian and Aunt Ally were there with us when we got the news and it was so wonderful for him to be there since he will be gone when our little man is born.

On that note, Brian is leaving Sunday to begin his deployment, please keep praying for peace for the family and protection over every hair on his head.

What a glorious day!!

Hospital Trip Details

2010-01-12T15:40:00.004-06:00

Hello everyone. It's Amanda-we are finally home from the hospital! Thank you Lord for watching over my angel girl AGAIN these past few days. We are both pretty exhausted after this stay, Abby Grace is napping for the 3rd time today. Being pregnant and having a very unexpected hospital visit was enough to wear me out too. I will be going to bed early tonight no doubt. Anyway, I know David's posts were vague so I just wanted to update and give all the details. Thank you for praying for us this week

Saturday night me, Ty and Abby Grace were out having dinner with David's mom and all of the sudden out of nowhere AG starts screaming and crying of a headache (She had been behaving normally all day long). I was trying to console her but she was holding her head and crying because it hurt so bad. So I reached in my purse to get her some Tylenol and she starts throwing up everywhere. It was so bad and just would not stop. So when she finally stops throwing up, she is still crying of a headache. (Thank goodness Grandma had a towel in her car because I had to carry her out of the restaurant wrapped in it.) I honestly thought it was something from her stomach, but she was insisting that it was her head that hurt and not her belly. So I get back to Grandma's house and get her in the tub and she starts playing around, and I thought she was better, maybe she just needed to throw up a little (or an INSANE AMOUNT in a PUBLIC restaurant, whichever you prefer). Then I got her out of the tub and was drying her off and she starts screaming in pain, again out of nowhere. She is holding her head, rocking back and forth, and unable to stand. I screamed for my MIL to come into the bathroom. Then Abby Grace went into a seizure that lasted about a minute. Her eyes rolled back into her head, she wouldn't respond to my voice, couldn't talk, or squeeze my hand. After it was over, I passed AG off to Grandma so I could gather our things and start to process everything that had happened. At the time, I didn't know it was a seizure but I knew it started with intense head pain, and that scared me bad. Abby Grace went right to sleep and was completely out and it was very difficult to wake her, almost as if she had a concussion or something. So I load the car and when I am picking her up she does the EXACT same thing all over again.....crying from head pain and goes into another seizure that lasts about a minute as well. On the way home she goes right into a deep sleep and I call David to let him know everything that happened and that I was calling her neurosurgeon.

When the on-call doctor called me back and I explained to him what had happened, he said to bring her to Texas Children's right away. I packed a bag, kissed David bye, and put her in the car. Upon arrival to the ER we were immediately put into a room and the waiting began. They immediately ordered a CT scan to look for any tumors or large growths on her brain. At the same time, the were concerned about her Chiari surgery and if she was having swelling or increased pressure from her brain (a rare complication). The neurosurgeon came down to look at her and decided to admit her to the neuro floor after he couldn't wake her, and ordered an emergency MRI for first thing Monday morning. He was concerned that there might have been a change in the Chiari and wanted to be sure she didn't need an emergency surgery to relieve pressure. It was a very long night to say the least.

Monday came and we were finally moved to a private room to wait for the MRI. My mom came up in the middle of the night since I had told David to stay home with Kayli and Ty (I honestly had no idea how serious it could have been at the time). Dr Jea came to see her first thing in the morning and said we would wait to make a plan of action until we saw MRI results. She did great under anesthesia, and actually did not wake up hysterical and combative this time. By this time my dad and sister were there too. Her CT scan showed no growth on the brain and her MRI came back looking exactly the same as her other post-surgery scan (a great thing).

Since those two initial scans came back normal that means that her seizures were not a neurosurgery related issue, but rather a totally separate neurology issue. They are also assuming right now that her sleep apnea is a separate neurology issue as well and not solely coming from the Chiari as they once thought. Basically that means that all 3 problems are separate which is almost more discouraging to me, than them all being related. It is easier for me to wrap my head around when I think they are all related.

We have a rushed sleep study scheduled for this Thursday night which will accomplish 2 things: 1. Determine how her sleep apnea has changed if any. 2. Do an EEG to see what her brain waves look like so we have something to compare to if the seizures continue.

We will follow up with her neurologist on Jan 20 to go over her sleep study and talk about a future plan for Abby in greater detail. At this point we are hoping the seizures were just a one time thing and they never happen again, but if that is not God's plan, we are just waiting for the next one to happen basically. They will not give medication for seizures unless they know they will continue and they are a little leery of giving her medication because of all her neuro history.

You can pray with us specifically for a few things:
1. That the seizures do not continue.
2. The sleep study will show a drastic improvement in her central apnea.
3. Her neurosurgeon and neurologist to have wisdom and discernment for her plan of care.

God was once again watching over our angel and protected her from what could have been an emergency brain surgery. I am beyond baffled at why He chooses to bring us through each step on our journey in such miraculous ways. I am humbled. I am grateful. I am beyond undeserving.

On a much lighter note, we have an appointment tomorrow for for the anatomy scan and hopefully find out if we are having a boy or girl!!! I am so excited. If you think about it, say a little prayer that everything on the baby looks great the little punkin is healthy. It is an appointment that brings so much excitement and anxiety at the same time. Stay tuned for an announcement tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!

Love,
Amanda

Update Abby Grace

2010-01-11T21:30:00.002-06:00

Well this is David again...
Just wanted to give a slight update. Abby Grace is still in the hospital and should hopefully get out tomorrow... AB asked me to post an update... Amanda will update tomorrow to explain in better detail... Please keep praying for Abby Grace... We appreciate your prayers and concern... Thanks,
David

Last Night

2010-01-11T08:57:00.002-06:00

This is David... Just wanted to give everyone a heads up on what is going on... Last night Abby Grace had to go to Texas Childrens. She is actually still currently there. We are asking for your continued prayer over her and the family as I will post what I can in the next day or say when we get some answers and results... Amanda will be able to better describe what is happening, yet doesn't have access to a Computer on the Neuro floor... I ask everyone to pray for little Abby Grace, and will update soon...

Thanks,
David

Change, Miracles, and Gratitude

2010-01-04T21:43:00.003-06:00

Normally, I do not make New Years resolutions per say, but I do feel like it is important for us to reflect on 2009 and all the heartache and miracles it brought for our family. I know I will not be the same after last year, and I am grateful for that. Also, 2010 is going to bring many new challenges and blessings our way and I feel that is important too. I am ready for change, and I need it honestly.

So first I want to look back on 2009, and then look ahead to the things I know 2010 is going to bring. I have made a few goals that I will share here as well, so I can look back on them later!!

2009 was the scariest year for me as a mother and a wife to be very honest. I spent months of the year completely full of stress, worry, and fear. That is not something I am proud to admit, but I can say that it changed me as a person and I am thankful.

JANUARY 2009
The first time I walked through my bedroom to find Abby Grace completely blue and not breathing in her sleep. As her mother I knew something was terribly wrong but my pediatrician was dismissing that it could be anything serious.

FEBRUARY 2009
~AG had a minor surgery to replace the tubes in her ears, and she stopped breathing on the table under the anesthesia. What a blessing that would turn out to be..... Her anesthesiologist would come to tell me that there was definitely a breathing issue and we needed to look into it at Texas Children's. (We would later find out that he had made a call to someone he knew at Texas Children's to get AG in for a sleep study.)
~David and I celebrated our 3 wedding anniversary. We went to dinner at Olive Garden and spent some child-free quality time together. I know in my heart that when he looks at me he loves me and thinks I am the most beautiful woman on this earth, and I am so grateful for that.

MARCH 2009
We got in to Texas Children's for her first sleep study where we would learn how bad her central apnea really was. At that time, she stopped breathing every 10-12 minutes for up to 30 seconds at a time. WOW, scary. There were COUNTLESS nights that I would lay awake each night scared that she would stop breathing in her sleep and die laying right beside me. Then I would have to get up every morning and go to work with little to no sleep.
~She was put on a VERY strict schedule to try and help the apnea. Her schedule forced her to be in bed by 7:30 with lights out at 8. That left David to be the one taking Kayli and Ty to all of their practices and games, and me home with AG. It was almost as if I was missing their lives and David was missing AG having to be gone for sports with Bug and Ty. It was a very big and hard adjustment for everyone. We were parenting separately it seemed for a few months.
~Kayli Bug turned 10 years old and I could not believe how much she was growing up right before me. Such a change from the little 5 year old girl she was when David and I started dating. I am loving these new times with her, and appreciating who she is becoming.

MAY 2009
Because AG's apnea was all central (coming from the brain) she had to have an MRI of her brain. Her neurologist reassured me it was "completely routine and she just wanted to rule anything out". We very quickly learned that her results were anything but routine. She had a very large abnormality on her brain called a Chiari Malformation, and she needed an MRI if her spine to see if it had caused permanent damage to her spinal cord.

JUNE 2009
Her MRI of the spine was scheduled and we were to meet with a neurosurgeon later that day to discuss her results. We learned that there had not been any permanent damage to her spinal cord, but the Chiari was extremely large. Her only method of treatment was a very invasive and serious decompression surgery. Dr. Jea wanted to schedule her surgery asap. The first time I felt peace in the entire situation was when I met her neurosurgeon, Dr. Andrew Jea. I knew all the way to my toes that if my baby needed surgery, then he would be the one to do it.
~Kayli and Ty are out of school for the summer and staying with family during the day while David and I are working.
~Ty has his 9 birthday and it was a hard day for me. I have always "babied" him so to speak, and was sad to realize that he wouldn't be my 4 year old boy, full of questions forever. He was becoming his own person and not needing me quite as much as before. But he will always be a mommas boy at heart, I know.

JULY 2009
~We went on family vacation (planned prior to surgery) with my entire family. We really wanted to enjoy each other a make memories together before this major operation. It was full of taking walks, fishing, and roasting marshmellows. Kayli and Ty were in heaven!!!
~While on vacation, (only 7 days before AG surgery) I got a very bad bite from a copperhead snake and spent almost 2 days in the hospital. I was to be completely off my foot for at least 4 weeks, and in severe pain.
~After vacation, we went to each of the benefits that my company and David's put together to help us cover medical expenses and things we needed while we were at the hospital. We were so blessed and we really saw how much people loved and cared about our family. Looking back, I'm not sure how we would have made it if it weren't for the benefits.
~July 27 came quickly and our entire families and some very close friends were with us at the hospital waiting for AG to come out of surgery. After about 6 hours David and I were finally able to see her. She was swollen a little, disoriented, and in pain but she was in my arms and that's all I cared about at that moment. I did not expect the bandage on her head to be so big, but she was alive and we couldn't have been more relieved.
~The first 36 hours after surgery were some of the hardest of my life, but on day 2 it was like she just woke up and was ready to eat, (an entire tray of chicken nuggets and mashed potatoes)
talk, and even walk!!! We were seeing a miracle right before our eyes and all the doctors on the floor were talking about her. Kayli and Ty were able to visit and AG was so happy to see them and she even played a bit.
~We were discharged only 5 days after surgery!!!!!!!! Praise God.

August 2009
~Abby Grace is still recovering far beyond what we could have imagined and celebrates her 3 birthday.
~Kayli and Ty are trying to get settled into a routine with all of us being home together again and they start a new school year. They were so happy to have their Momma back after all that craziness I think.
~There was also one last benefit this month that my dad's friends put together for us and it was unbelievable.
~I was still home from work with AG while she was recovering.

SEPTEMBER 2009
~The decision was made for me to be a stay at home mom again to be home with the kids more. I left the best company I could have ever worked for, but I knew that being with the kids was more important and it was the best for us.
~I turned 25.

OCTOBER 2009
~Found out we were expecting baby number 4!! We were very excited and nervous at the same time. Finding out you are pregnant is very scary after you have miscarried, so we kept it private until December.
~AG had a repeat sleep study that revealed she was having MORE central apnea than before her surgery. She now stops breathing every 8-10 minutes for up to 30 seconds at a time. Dr is puzzled about this, and sends us back for another MRI of her brain and spine, and says she must now sleep on oxygen every night. MRI reveals that she has the right amount of cerebral fluid flowing around her brain (which is good) but she will require another sleep study in 3 months. If her apnea has not improved, we will discuss another brain surgery in February 2010.

NOVEMBER 2009
~Spent a wonderful Thanksgiving with each of our families and really tried to focus on everything the Lord had done for our family during the year.
~Pregnancy is still going great, other than the OUT OF CONTROL "all day sickness" that forced me to stay home all the time.

DECEMBER 2009
~We learned that David's brother Brian would be deployed again in January and the family is rocked by the news.
~Planned Christmas parties for Kayli and Ty at school and went on multiple field trips with them. I was so thankful to be home and able to make those memories with them!!
~Had Christmas celebrations with all of our families and it was the best time of just being together.
~Pregnant belly is really starting to show now and it is wonderful.
~Uncle Brian and Ally got engaged to be married. Oh how I love weddings!!!

That pretty much sums up our year I think. I know that God was with us every step of the way this year, and He orchestrated everything in perfect ways even I couldn't have imagined. I think I recognized that for the first time in my life, and it was pretty big for me. I knew that He cared about every single tiny detail that worried me, and took care of them all. If I had to sum up our year in a few words it would probably be Change, Miracles, and Gratitude. At the time, I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel, and I did not want any part of this life with doctors appointments and test results, but now I wouldn't trade it for the world and I am grateful for our story and our miracles.

I honestly didn't expect this to be so long, so I will post things coming in 2010 and goals I have set in a day or so. I'm sorry if it went forever, but I know I will want to go back and reflect on this time years from now.

With so much love,
Amanda

Christmas Pictures

2009-12-31T12:57:00.006-06:00

My ideal goal is to post a couple of times today. I have so much that I want to get out before this year is over. I had better start now, since the clock is ticking away!!!

Here are the pictures from each of our Christmas celebrations. Each year we celebrate with my family and with David's, and we are so blessed that our families live close enough that we have plenty of time to spend with each before moving on to the next house.

We had so much fun making memories with everyone. This year was so significant for lots of reasons in our family and we are grateful to just be together and have each other. I wanted the kids to see that was more important than any of the gifts they opened. They did however, receive tons of gifts, and I'm not sure I will ever find order in my house again, ever!! :)

Those pictures were from Nana and G-Pa's house. We ate homeade fried chicken, that was super delish!!!!! Nana makes the best.

I thought this picture was SO cute!!!!

This is David's PaPa and the kiddos. He is in early stages of Alzheimer's so we are thankful he was able to be there and the kids are always excited to see him.

I cannot believe how old they all look here.

This is my Mammaw and all the great grandchildren after they decorated the gum-drop tree, a tradition we have done since I was a little girl. When my Mammaw and Pappaw lived in Decatur Texas, we would always travel there for Thanksgiving. After lunch we would take a walk to find the perfect "stickerbush". It is a branch that is covered in thorns and we would put gumdrop candies on each of the thorns. Anyhow, now that they live here, we though we wouldn't be able to do it anymore. One of the neighbors found one for us and mailed it to my Mammaw. She was so surprised and excited!! It was such a kind gesture and the kids were pumped about it.

There is our Christmas in pictures. It was wonderful and we have so much to celebrate this year.

Quick baby update: I am now 17 weeks and everything is still going great. I can feel the baby moving now every once in a while (especially after chocolate milk) and we find out if it's a boy or girl in 2 weeks! Cannot wait!!

Amanda

Haygood Christmas Party

2009-12-13T22:02:00.004-06:00

Here are some pictures from the Christmas party we had this weekend. This is our neice Marissa and Bug.

Abby Grace and Ally, who is Uncle Brian's girlfriend. We LOVE LOVE LOVE her. Did I mention we love her? She is so great, and we are so glad she is close by so we can spend time with her while Brian is away with the Army. The kiddos are crazy about her too, especially Abby Grace.

I love this picture!!! This is all the grandkids on the Haygood side of the family. They are all looking so old lately.

When they have on these pettiskirts, they feel the need for much twirling about. It is so precious.

Is this not such a sweet picture?

Miss Priss sitting still for one tiny second.

I know it looks like he is choking her here, but she really did walk up and give him the sweetest hug. Ty just held on a little too long for a picture!!

Her hair is starting to look SO red!!!

Abby Grace loves her Uncle Brian SO much. Anytime he is around, he has ALL of her attention, unless of course Ally is there. :)

It breaks my heart to think about how big the kids are gonna be when he comes home.

The most favorite Nana and GPa!!!

Uncle Brian and Ally

She was being such a little ham!!

Me and my girls

A quick family picture before we left. Look at the baby bump............it's growing and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it!!!!!!!!!!!!

As you can tell, everyone had a great time at the party.

Local Family Needs Help!!!

2009-12-10T21:59:00.004-06:00

Hey friends. I am going to apologize now for the "all over the place" feel to this post. I have pregnancy hormones apparently and a totally scattered brain, but I need to get out a few things.....Please read to the bottom, its the most important part!!!!

First off, I went to the doctor today and everything still looks great with the baby. Heartbeat was strong at 160 bpm and I am always so relieved to hear that sound. I don't know why, but I always have this horrible fear on the way to the doctor that the heartbeat will be gone and something will have gone terribly wrong. Hearing news like that changes you forever I know that much. BUT, we get to find out the sex of the baby on Jan 13!!!! I cannot believe I will already be 5 months pregnant at that time. Thank you Lord for this healthy pregnancy...

Moving right along........so I have really been stressed lately about Christmas and finances. Don't get me wrong, our bills are all paid and there are groceries in the house, and we have absolutely nothing to complain about. I just always put so much pressure on myself about what gifts we will give the kiddos. UNNECESSARY PRESSURE........So, since I am staying home now, we obviously will be downsizing a bit. Anyway, I have really gotten caught up in this whole stress situation that I have completely brought upon myself, and I really couldn't get ahold of it...........

Then today, I got an email from a friend about a close family friend. Her family lost everything they own in a house fire last night. They have 4 young children and absolutely nothing. Praise Jesus that nobody was hurt, but can you imagine not even having a toothbrush or a pair of socks or any for your kids for that matter?? My goodness, I have just cried and felt so terrible about all the belly-aching I have been doing. I really want to get some items together for this family to help them out while everything else is so unsettled.

I am going to post some things that the family is needing, and clothes sizes of the children. Maybe your kiddos have grown out of some things and you could donate.

Kaitlyn- age 10 size 12 girls
Dawson- age 7 size 8 boys
Joshua- age 5 size 6 boys
Brandon- age 4 size 5t pants and size 6 shirt

I do not know shoe sizes yet, but I am trying to find out. I also do not know any sizes as far as Mom and Dad are concerned either.

Other items that have been requested are bathroom items such as toothbrushes, shampoo, conditioner, etc... clothes, shoes, toys, are all also on the list I have. Other things I can think of are gift cards to Wal Mart, or for gas, socks, jackets for the kids (I have one for Kaitlyn already). Anyhow, I cannot think of anything else right now, but I'm sure you get the picture.
(I know the children's school is going to replace their backpacks with school supplies, so that has been covered.)

If there is anyone local that can contribute, they would be so thankful. I know that everyone is financially strapped right now, but maybe you have some gently used items, that would be fantastic. If you can not contribute, please please remember them in your prayers rights now. Pray for comfort for those sweet babies, and for mom and dad to feel peace. Pray that all of their immediate needs can be met soon and that the community will rally around them with love and support. My heart just breaks for her family and I really want to help out. Please email me at something_sassy123@yahoo.com and we can make arrangements to get the items to this sweet family.

Goodnight,
Amanda

Snow in Texas!!!

2009-12-06T20:28:00.004-06:00

So, Friday, we had a beautiful, VERY cold addition to our day........SNOW!!! The kids were beyond excited. Here are some pictures of their glorious snow day in Texas.

They absolutely had a blast and it was so cute to hear all their laughter from the backyard.

On a more serious note, please be in prayer for us and the rest of David's family right now. We just found out that his brother Brian has received his orders from the military to be deployed AGAIN. He leaves right after Christmas and we are just devastated. We are so sad he won't be here when the baby is born. (He was deployed on his first tour when Abby Grace was born as well.) It is heartwrenching for us to think of him being gone for so long again. Please pray specifically for his protection and that of all the other soldiers. Also remember the other wives and children who are hearing this news right now about the soldier in their lives. Expect many more updates in the coming months, so Uncle Brian see how everyone is doing while he is away.

We love you Brian and are heartbroken to see you go, but cannot wait until you are home safe again!!

Learning To Cook

2009-12-01T15:46:00.003-06:00

Honestly, I have always really wanted to be this fabulous cook and if I'm going to be honest....I'm really not good at it. Well, let me take that back......I have always really wanted to be a BAKER and make all these glorious little desserts and serve them at parties (that I rarely have). Nonetheless, seeing how we just celebrated Thanksgiving, the season of food always brings out that desire in me again. However, it makes me feel better to blame my oven for being defective, rather than the chef herself of course!!

However, I did make a brocoli rice casserole and a sopapilla cheesecake for Thanksgiving. You do technically BAKE the cheesecake in the oven, so I guess that makes me a baker after all.......I am now officially on a mission for a very cute and sassy apron!!! LOL

Anyhow, tell me what did you bake this Thanksgiving? Was it a hit? It's okay to blame your oven if it was a flop......it works for me HA!!!

And speaking of cooking, I might not be the world's greatest chef, BUT the Lord did certainly bless me with a much more adventurous cooking project, that I will be working on for the next few months...............

SOOO...................

YEP, you guessed it!!!!!!! That is the newest little punkin that's COOKIN around here these days. We are so very excited for baby #4!!! The battle of boy or girl is already on in full force!!! Please pray with us that our newest miracle will be HEALTHY whether we will be shopping for pink or blue!!!!!!

I hope you all had a safe a wonderful Thanksgiving. We certainly have much to be thankful for in our house this year.

Amanda

Long Over Due Pictures

2009-11-15T18:12:00.010-06:00

Okay so since I keep promising some recent pictures, here they are (better late than never!!!)

Ty and his best bud Bryce on Halloween.

Okay, can you tell that Abby Grace wanted NOTHING TO DO with the donkey?? Look at her eyes! LOL, it was SO funny!! You should have heard her squeal when I put her on to ride it. LOL, I know I am terrible.

I still cannot believe he picked up this Rabbit. None of my kiddos are really into barn animals. Right after I snapped this picture, he totally dropped the rabbit when it started to wiggle. Kayli would not even go in the petting zoo.

Yeah he looks a little nervous.

There they are riding the train.

Kayli's Nana made her costume, isn't it beautiful???

The little purple fairy. She even had on purple sparkly shoes. It was so stinkin cute!!!

Okay moving on to softball.......

This is Caeden, one of the little brothers on the team. He and Abby Grace are pretty close in age and he is just smitten with her. So cute.

She always acts so shy when he kisses her.

Here is Bug sporting her sunglasses.

Again, our famous #3

She has always been such a serious ball player. It's funny to see her mood change from on the field to in the dugout.

Is he not so handsome?? Just like his daddy........

These are the best buddies from the team. JT, Ty, Bryce, and I accidently cut off TJ's face...... They have played together for a few years now, and really become great friends on the team....

After the game, play time with the boys. There was usually a coach at the bottom of that pile!!

Team Picture......Tyler is acting tough and won't smile.....he is getting too old to smile at the camera for mom I think!!

So here he is again, my handsome #4!!!

Sorry I have been such a slacker with pictures lately. I am going to try and post a lot more since I am home now and all!! Alright friends, I hope that you all had a great weekend and I will update again soon.

Amanda

Long Long Day

2009-11-12T22:06:00.002-06:00

So I am finally sitting down to unwind a bit and think over our day. We ended up being at the hospital ALL day long literally, so we are exhausted.

MRI this morning was LONG it felt like, but she had no breathing complications. She did however have a reaction that she has never had before to the anesthesia. When I went to her in recovery, she was already bawling crying and her eyes were all swollen and red. The right side of her face was drooping and it was not a pretty sight. The drooping cleared up quickly, thank you Lord!!! However the very red, swollen eyes stayed for the rest of the day. They also would not stop watering like crazy, it was like she was really crying. And her nose was running like crazy. Nonetheless, it's over and I'm glad.

We saw Dr. Jea this afternoon and he went over in detail her MRI results. We saw video clips of what her brain looks like while sleeping, and it is amazing actually. I love it when a doctor takes the time to be thorough and make sure that you understand everything. Anyway, he said he is very pleased with the "picture part" of her brain. In the live video you can clearly see the fluid flowing ALL around her brain, which is night and day from before her surgery. (She was 100% blocked before her operation) Looking at Abby Grace and talking to her, he is also very pleased with her recovery thus far. However, there is one thing he is not happy with and he is going to be keeping a close eye on in the near future. ..........

Given the persistence of her central apnea and it's frequent nature, Dr. Jea and Dr. H (sleep doctor) have come to the agreement that something must be done and it can't be left like this. Right now the tentative plan is to repeat her sleep study and MRI in 3 months. If her central apnea has not subsided by that time, Abby Grace will have another major operation.

This surgery will involve Dr. Jea and his team actually operating in her brain itself. In her first surgery, they were in the area, but basically just removed a lot of bone. This time they will go in and actually shrink the malformation (which is essentially part of her brain). I will share more about this tomorrow, as I am still trying to process all of this myself. Thank you so much for all your prayers today. We are so grateful.............

Amanda

Tomorrow's Appointment

2009-11-11T22:30:00.003-06:00

So I meant to post this for you all yesterday, but forgive me as I have been horribly ill. I STILL have Halloween pictures to post, the kids were so precious. But I have hospital bags to pack for AG so it's down to business tonight......

We have to be at Texas Children's first thing in the morning for AG's lengthy MRI of her brain and spine. Then we will meet with her neurosurgeon and get the results from her MRI right away. The big question we are trying to answer with this MRI is whether her surgery from July was a success or not. From what I understand, if her surgery WAS NOT a success she is possibly facing another operation. If her surgery WAS a success, then they will start looking for something else on her brain that could be causing all this central apnea. However, I cannot possibly imagine anything else being on her brain that would not have been found with all the MRI's and scans she has already had, but I am no doctor.

So right now we are praying for a few things:
~There is no problem with the anesthesia, and she has no breathing complications.
~We can make a plan of action on how we will best handle her care from here on out.
~Whatever we learn tomorrow, we will remember to be grateful and praise God, even if tomorrow brings a storm for us.

I will update you all tomorrow night on her appointment. Thank you so much for all your prayers.

Amanda

Updates and Prayer Request

2009-10-25T21:38:00.002-05:00

Hello all:

Quick post tonight, as I have a very big jewelry show Monday through Wednesday this week, and need some rest. I set up tonight and I am already exhausted and the week hasn't started yet. I might be in trouble....

My most sincere apology for not posting the results of Abby Grace's last sleep study. I was a little bummed by the results and frankly, just wasn't ready to talk about it I guess. However, it just lets me know that our journey did not end when she had this surgery, and it isn't time for us to get off the ride just yet. She is having MORE central apnea, than she was having prior to her surgery, which was VERY discouraging to me. I spoke with multiple doctors that day, and they all have said we are in "uncharted territory" with Abby Grace and her case is "so rare" (meaning all of her symptoms combined and the SIZE of her chiari; not actually having a chiari itself) that we really don't know what to do with her at this point. So, the plan is for now, that we will repeat her sleep study in December to see if her brain has healed or adjusted anymore since her surgery. We are still very much anticipating her MRI on November 12 and our fervent prayer is right now that her surgery was indeed a success. However, if when we see the results of her MRI and the surgery IS deemed a success, there is a possibility that they will start looking for something ELSE on her brain that could be causing all this central apnea. Obviously we do not want to go there. Hope that all made sense.......

One of the other things we are doing to try and help her with this apnea is, she will be sleeping on oxygen every night. Her first night was last night and it was very short lived, but not for the reasons you would think. She let me put the cannula in her nose, and wrap it around her head, and she even went right to sleep without too much of a fuss. But the problem is, it won't stay on her nose and when she turns over it wraps around her......so needless to say, I took it off because it really wasn't safe. So are there any parents out there who have to use oxygen for your kids? I would love to hear any tips you could give me on making it a little safer so she doesn't get this around her neck in the night? That is one worry I just cannot have....

Also, I want to ask all of you to please pray for my family right now, my brother and his wife specifically. I cannot go into detail just yet, but there is the possibility of an addition to our family very soon and I just ask that you cover them in prayer right now. We ask for the Lord's protection over them, for His guidance and wisdom, but most importantly that this precious child have a safe and loving home to grow up in. Thank you all so much.

I think that is all the updating for tonight. S0 sorry no energy for pictures, although I have baseball and softball pics to post. I need to get it together......maybe on another day. Goodnight friends, thank you for being such a part of this journey with us called life!!!

Amanda

Busy, Busy, Busy

2009-10-15T10:26:00.003-05:00

Well this is David. I just wanted everyone to know that things have been so hectic lately w/ Softball, Work, Baseball, Work, and finally Work.

Bug has been sick the past few days w/ her usual prewinter wheezing, and congestion. T and her usually about this time have severe trouble w/ wheezing, sneezing, and all around just no fun. They have ahstma( spelling incorrect?), and that is just so fun... I feel so sorry for them because they have their inhalers, plus breathing treatments, and not to mention their rescue inhalers if it gets bad. Plus they take their allergy meds. every night. Bug has had softball going on Tues. and Thurs. and then playing on the weekend. Weekend before last she played in Beaumont... That was nice... I felt like I was going to the Astros game or something.... Had to pay to get in after you drove an hour and a half. Then you could only have one cooler, and it had to have water or Gatorade for the girls. No soda's or anything to that effect.... Went to get a drink... 3.25... ouch... Needless to say I made that last forever.... I was informed it was bad so we stopped before we got there and ate. Was a good thing considering nachos were 4.25. I was hoping they put some gold flakes, maybe some diamonds or something... Autographed T-shirt? That was an adventure. So we played our games at 8 ( Bug was at the walk) , 11, 1:40, 4:00. Well the last game went in to ITB ( overtime ). So we got done at 6 and decided to go eat because we didn't want to spent a hundred dollars at the concession stand.. ha..ha... I would rather save those for Abby and her medicine trips.... Sometimes yes I still have to reach in the wallet for those $100 ( $ 1 ) bills... I think she just does it now because she gets paid... Anyways, we went and ate hurried through that so we could be back by 7:15...game being at 7:45. What happens.... we get back into the park, and you wouldn't guess the lights had gone out the entire time we were gone. They were an hour behind. OK, nice... So it is sprinkling now... (had been all day). We warm the girls up, and take our place on the field.... Umpire: Coach's. Go see the coordinator for the tournament... We are not playing this game tonight.... What we ended our last game at 6.... sat around till 9.... Get on the field to play.... Have to pack up, storm is coming. Be back at 7 n the morning.... Get home, and luckily at 6 Sunday morning they canceled the tournament.... Thank the lord..... We were off last weekend, but are back in action going to be in sugarland this weekend.... Bug loves it though.... What can I say...

T has had baseball on Tues. and Thurs., and games on Sat. It is a whole new ball game w/ kid pitch. Tyler's game last Sat. he got hit twice.... I could hear Manda from on the field... Yes, he got hit in the face on one, and in the back on the other... I could hear her gasp each time... He just trots on down the field to first base like nothing happened and Manda is left gasping for air needing a tranquilizer... sedative..... Oxygen... Ambulance... Defibrillators... The works... I tell you she wasn't calmed down even by the end of the game. He is loving it though... There are either walks, or you get hit by the pitch... Seems like no one ever hits, but then again this is most of the kids fall playing kid pitch... He only has 3 more games left.... He plays on Sat. which is good....

Abitha (abby grace), is doing good. You know we have that MRI coming up in Nov. So we are praying for some kind of answer to that whole thing. She is just growing up before our eyes. Actually all three are getting so big. If she could only wipe her but we would be good... I am just saying.... Would be nice. Best accomplishment in my life when Bug and T could wipe there own... Just lifted weight off my shoulders...ha..ha... Anyways, she is just in love w/ the new turtles we now have. Manda will have to post the pics. We let our big one go ( not n the street or anything ). We made a big to do about it. Family affair. Lets just say there was melt down city. Luckily we had the camera.... Well I just wanted to fill everyone in on what is going on. Manda has been so busy....

Manda has a show this weekend in San Marcus... it is gonna be hectic.... She has been working none stop on here jewelry to get ready for all of this. Plus she has been fighting a cold... We love to play pass the cold in our house.... Germs... What germs... Forget board game night... We do share the cold night... So fun and just full of excitement.. Kidding of course for those w/ your mouths dropped open. I will try to get the pics from our Turtle melt down.... They are priceless... and show the new guys....

Until then be safe, GOD bless, and we will be praying for you all...

David

Poor Neglected Blog

2009-10-05T22:14:00.002-05:00

Okay so really, does anyone even read this anymore? Really, I should get it together, but the last week has come with major curve balls and chaos around our house. So I will give a quick update on AG's sleep study from last week......

Well, we go back for our "official report" from the study this Thursday. However, she did have lots of apnea during the night according to our wonderful nurse that handled the study. That was a very big shock to me, for 2 reasons......
1. Because I was laying in bed RIGHT beside her (AWAKE) and had no idea it was even happening. It makes me nervous, b/c as her Momma I could not physically see any choking or struggling from her, and had absolutely no idea it was even going on. It makes me wonder, on the nights I CAN see and hear her struggling, how bad is it really? (I'm probably better off not knowing honestly.)
2. Because it is so easy to just assume that since she is walking and talking, that everything is great, and our journey down this bumpy path is over. And maybe I am the only one who assumed that, but it clearly is not over and there are still some things going on. But really, I am okay about it, and I know God is going to keep His loving and protective arms around her.....even in the middle of the night when I cannot. I know He is there, and I am not filled with FEAR like I was before. I do not stay awake ALL night long to just watch her like I once did, that is not God's intention. I do believe with my entire being, that He wants to teach me something in all of this. So far and am slowly and painfully (at times) learning that I cannot control everything and I need to back off and let Him orchestrate this beautiful plan He has for my family.

Moving on, I have learned that from a medical standpoint a few things about possible treatment for her apnea. She will not require a C-PAP machine, as that is only used for patients with "obstructive" apnea (AG has "central" apnea, coming from something in her brain). But she will probably have to sleep with the assistance of oxygen and a nasal cannula. The oxygen will prevent any further damage to her organs from going without oxygen during the night. We have no indication that there is damage to any organs at this time, but it just isn't good for oxygen to constantly stop and go all night long. I am not looking forward to fighting with her every night to wear this said nasal cannula, HOWEVER it seems so minor compared to many other issues we could be dealing with right now.

So, I think that is everything AG that is going on right now.......

Tyler had a great baseball game this Saturday, they won!!! I would have taken pictures except, I totally had a migraine headache and couldn't even really see the field. Also, let me just say that we have the worst mosquitoes EVER right now, and it is SO irritating. The boys were getting practically carried away on the field, with bug spray on!!! Ty has been playing baseball since he was 5 and it is so funny b/c he has ALWAYS been a really good slider, and will slide right into the base JUST to get his pants dirty (even if he is not even close to being tagged out). The dirtier he is at the end of a game, the better. Apparently, when you are 9 that doesn't change either, b/c he slid into 2 base and was covered in mud!! When he looked over at me, I knew exactly what he was thinking with that half grin!!

Kayli played in Beaumont this weekend, and I didn't go since I had to be in DP for baseball. They didn't have such a great weekend as far as winning is concerned, but she had so much fun. She came home absolutely exhausted and went straight to bed after her shower. And Sunday it rained ALL day long and she pretty much rested all day long. Her and Ty had gotten up at 6am to head downtown for the Race For The Cure, with David's Momma (A SURVIVOR FOR 7 YEARS, PRAISE JESUS!!!). Anyhow, David picked her up from downtown at 9:30 and they went straight to her tournament where she played her first game at 11:15 and played a total of 4 games!! I don't know how she does that I'm telling you. They didn't get home until after 10:00. They were supposed to be back in Beaumont by 7 am Sunday morning, but I guess God knew she was pretty tired, because He gave her rain instead!! Don't get me wrong, the girl loves her some softball, but secretly I know she was happy to lounge on Sunday.

So, we are just getting into our routine for the week and praying for good results on Thursday for Miss Priss. Hope you all had a FAB weekend, that is of course if you still read this poor, neglected blog. :)

Amanda